Page 45 of The Spirit of Love
“Whoa,” Edie says. “Love of your life?”
“I just think I should go into battle with as much knowledge as possible,” I say.
“I like the advice Lorena gave you last night,” Edie says. “It’s far more likely that your brain erotically conflated these two men than that they’re close blood relatives. She should patent that term.”
“PANCAAAAAKES!” Teddy and Frank dive-bomb into the kitchen to the tune of theSpongeBobclosing credits. Each twin wraps himself around one of my legs as I frog-walk their steaming plates to the table. Now they clamor up to the breakfast nook, pressing in either side of their mother like Edie is a human pillow. Jarvis, usually chill, begins to wail.
“I didn’t forget you, Jarv,” I sing, passing Edie a bowl of torn-up pancake bites for the red-faced baby, who tucks into them as his hiccups and sniffles subside.
“You hungry, Ede?” I ask her, making an adult plate, which I’ll top with the passion fruit syrup.
My sister closes her eyes. “My sustenance is silence,” she says as her children chew.
“I’ll leave a plate in the oven for you,” I offer. “It’ll still be warm when the boys leave for school.”
“Morning, Fenny,” says my brother-in-law, coming into the kitchen smelling like aftershave and the cedar shoe-stuffers I got him for Christmas. Todd works the sports desk on the same news channel where Edie works as a meteorologist. He looks at the plate in my hands. “That for me? Looks incredible.”
Edie and I roll our identical eyes, but I hand the plate to Todd and make a second one to save for Edie. Todd sits like an island across the table from his wife and three kids. He tries to mime a kiss at Edie, but she’s pulling pancake out of Teddy’s hair.
“So what’s wrong today?” Todd asks me.
“Why do you always assume something is wrong with me?” I ask.
He answers through a huge mouthful of pancakes. “Because you cook when you’re angry.”
“I do not cook when I’m angry,” I say, defensive, and then, turning to my sister, “Do I cook when I’m angry? Are we even talking to him today?”
“No,” Edie says, as if just remembering. She levels a gaze at her husband. “Becausesomeonethinks it’s perfectly appropriate to show his mother our credit card bills.”
“For the twelfth time, babe,” Todd says with remarkable patience, “I didn’tshowher. She happened to glance. She’s a glancer. We know this about her.”
“She keeps a letter opener in her purse,” Edie says, and I swallow back a laugh.
“Completely unrelated! She’s just too nervous to carry mace in case one of her dogs get into her purse, and she once had a thing in a parking lot—”
“Whatever,” Edie says through gritted teeth. “I don’t wanther judging my skin care purchases anymore. Once was enough. And Fenny doesn’t cook when she’s angry!”
“What’sskin cawe?” Frank lisps, sliding down from the table.
“It’s Mommy’s version ofSpongeBob,” I say. “It makes her happy.”
I watch as Todd slides into the seat Frank vacated so he, too, can be next to my sister. I wonder how it feels having so many male bodies pressed against you all the time. Does Edie ever want to scream? Build a moat around her body? Run out the door and never come back?
But then I watch as Todd gently lifts the baby from her arms—Jarv has dozed off with a piece of pancake between his lips. Todd removes the pancake morsel, pops it in his own mouth, and with his spare hand, gives my sister’s neck a massage, which I can see she deeply needs. She closes her eyes and lets her head drop forward, onto the table.
“Breathe, baby,” he says. “I’ll have a word with Mom about snooping, okay? It doesn’t mean we need to forbid her from entering the house, right?”
My sister huffs as if she’ll think about it. Todd kneads her shoulder tenderly. He kisses the side of her head.
“Because Grandma also loves to babysit,” he reminds Edie softly. “And iron.”
“She does like to iron,” Edie says on an inhale.
“Just breathe, love. Let it out.”
My sister, now a human puddle, exhales deeply. I realize she might not want that invisible fence after all.
She looks up at me and nods. “You know what? Todd’s right. You do cook when you’re angry.”
