Page 197 of Captivated
“Letting it all hang out. I like it.”
Zeeb cackled. “Knew you would.” He paused. “You mentioned your dad just now, and you kinda jogged my memory. Something I’ve been meaning to ask about Derek.”
“What about him?”
“Last night, when you were having… um….”
“My meltdown. It’s okay, I promise not to get mad.”
“No, because that’s not fair to you. We’ll just say you were letting a few things out. If you figuredyouwere sinful, what would that make Derek? He’d be doubly sinful, wouldn’t he? A gay man who’s into leather and all that kinky shit?”
There was silence for a moment.
“Nate?”
His sigh reached Zeeb’s ears. “You’re right. That was how I saw him. I’m ashamed when I think about how I was back then. I lashed out, angry at every goddamn thing, but Dad? He was like a calm, placid lake. No matter how many ripples I made, the lake never moved. It stayed right there until I was able to calm down.” Another sigh. “There were plenty of times I was certain he’d toss me out. If I’m honest, I think I tried to push him to do it, because then I’d have someone else to blame everything on. But Dad? He never gave up on me, even when I tried to shut him out. If anything, he just held on tighter. He kept telling me I deserved love—and that I had to start by loving myself before anyone else really could, without me messing it up or trying to sabotage it.”
“Always said he was a good man. That just proves it.”
“He had to be, to put up with me. It all came to a head one day after I threw an epic fit.” Nate huffed. “I don’t evenremember why I was so angry, but I was slamming around the house, pulling clothes out and shoving them in a bag. He stood there, and for the longest time he didn’t say a word. Finally, I turned around and told him, ‘Don’t worry, I’ll be out of your hair soon enough.’ He smiled at me and said ‘Is that what you think I want?’”
The next time Zeeb saw Derek, that man was going to get such a hug.
“And yeah, I thought that. I mean, I was a brat, and he had to be tired of my shit, right? Then he went over to the bag and started putting my stuff back in the drawers. When I asked what the hell he was doing, he turned and pulled me into a hug and asked, ‘Do you really want to go?’ I said yes, I wanted out of there. And still he just held on. He wouldn’t let go of me. It was maybe a good ten or fifteen minutes before the warmth of that hug finally got through to me.” Nate’s sigh floated on the air. “I’d shut myself off from my feelings for so long, it was like a layer of ice had formed around my heart, and Dad cracked it with a hug. I cried like a baby in his arms. I asked him why no one wanted me. He held on to me, and even to this day, I can still see his expression when he said ‘Iwant you, Nate, but I can’t do all the running. You need to let go of at least a little hurt and let me in.’” Nate paused. “So I did. Best decision ever. After that, he got me into therapy, and that brought me to where I am now.”
The beep of the coffee pot pierced the silence that followed Nate’s confession. A moment later, he appeared at the top of the stairs, carrying two cups.
Zeeb grinned. “Wow. Coffee delivered by a naked man. This must be my lucky day.”
Nate glanced at his crotch and flushed. “Part of you is obviously hoping to get lucky.”
He pushed the sheet down to reveal his morning wood. “I have a number in my head. If you guess right, I’ll make you breakfast in bed.”
“And if I guess wrong, I’m making it?”
Zeeb nodded, giving his shaft a lazy tug. “Well? Give it your best shot.”
“How am I supposed to guess a number? It could be anythi—” Nate’s eyes sparkled. “Wait. I think I’ve got it.”
He said nothing but grinned, keeping up the slow pump of his dick.
Nate placed the cups on the nightstand, then sat beside him on the bed.
“This number…. It wouldn’t start with six and end with nine, would it?”
Zeeb beamed. “See, Iknewyou were a smart man.” He curved his palm around Nate’s cheek. “I’m so freakin’ glad you had Derek.”
Nate’s warm smile was a ray of sunshine. “Me too.” He batted Zeeb’s hand away, and wrapped his fingers around Zeeb’s shaft. “Now, what can we find to do while our coffee cools?”
He leaned back against the pillows. “I’m sure you’ll think of something.”
“You remember all those texts we sent each other when I went home?”
Zeeb chuckled. “Of course. Sending those kept me going.”
“Well, you said something in one of them that I meant to ask you about, but it kept slipping my mind.”
“Do I take it you know now?”
