Page 154 of Give In
“I’m still missing the problem, angel. Help me understand.”
“I was a prop to them, and I could’ve lost myself because I tried to be who they wanted. Now I’m losing myself because I just do what everyone says. I let you take care of me. I can’t even be trusted to make my own decisions. I’m weak.”
In the face of my confession and my tears, I’d have expected Damien to balk or be sweetly polite or maybe even tell me to suck it up.
What I’d never have anticipated was for him to laugh in my face.
Hard.
“My depraved angel,” he said tenderly before throwing his head back to laugh some more.
It’s a shame we’re over and he’s laughingatme because he’s got a good laugh and he looks amazing when he does it.
“I don’t think this is very funny.”
“The idea that you’d actually do what you were told is funny on its own, but that you’d mindlessly obey what anyone says is fucking hilarious. I can’t even get you to do what I say, and youwantto do it. You are, by far, the most stubborn, strong-willed, infuriating woman I’ve met in my life.”
“Gee, thanks,” I muttered sarcastically.
His fingers dug into my hips. “You know it makes me hard as hell, so don’t pretend like it’s not a compliment.” Some of the heat left his gaze as it softened, warming as he smiled at me with affection and something else.
Something that looked a lot like pride, though I wasn’t sure why.
I didn’t have to wonder long.
Releasing my hips, he reached up and tucked my hair behind my ear. “You’re also, by far, the strongest person I’ve ever met. You gave up everything, moved across the country, and worked yourself ragged. If you were strong enough to do that, there’s no way you’d have conceded and married that bastard. You don’t give yourself enough credit.”
“I ran,” I whispered.
“You got away from something toxic. That’s not running. That’s being strong enough to stand up for yourself because you know you deserve better.”
His words rocked me to my very core. I’d never thought about it like that. In my head, I was nothing but a coward, fleeing from my problems.
He wasn’t done. “You’ve never let me take care of you. It’s like pulling tree trunks with tweezers to get you to let me do anything, and even then, I usually have to use sexual manipulation.”
“That’s not true.”
“It is. You’re so damn independent.” He pushed my hair back. “Always in your head. Always thinking about life like a chess match, trying to work out my next three moves so you can plan your next five. You love what we do, but you spend most of the time fighting against loving it.”
“I shouldn’t love it.”
“Why?”
“Because it’s wrong.”
“Says who?”
I had no answer. No matter what the topic, someone in the world would find fault with it. It didn’t make them correct. It just meant there was a lot of judgement from a lot of people who were probably doing much worse.
“The only opinions I care about are ours,” he said. “And you’ve never trusted me enough to actually let me take care of you to see if you like it, so your opinion doesn’t count, either.”
“I have so,” I insisted. Pausing for a moment, I tried to navigate my hazy wine-brain before adding, “I think.”
“There’s nothinkabout it, angel. When you actually give in…” He closed his eyes like he was savoring a fine scotch and a decadent dessert. “It’ll be something so beautiful, there’ll be no doubt.”
Fidgeting with the hem of the shirt, I whispered, “I’ll lose myself.”
“Never,” he vowed. “I want you to trust me with all that weight you carry around on your shoulders so that never happens.”
