Page 71 of Forgive Me, Father
“And yesterday?”I asked and he nodded.
“Do you have sex with them too?”
“Sometimes.But I didn’t yesterday.”
“The time before, when we fought?”I swallowed hard.He didn’t answer, just took a sip of his whiskey.Silence was also an answer.It hurt, I wasn’t going to lie, but I didn’t want anything to do with him then.So, it didn’t matter that much anyway.
“Were you ever going to tell me, or was it going to be business meetings all the time?”
“I wanted to tell you, I just didn’t know how,” he said, his voice tight.“I knew I had to, because someone would’ve eventually.”
I nodded, understanding all too well.People could be manipulative, always looking for a way to take advantage of what others had.Like Simi.I had no doubt she would have tried to use it against us.
“Do you even like having sex with me?”
“What?”He looked confused by my question.“It’s the best sex I’ve ever had.Don’t ever doubt that.”
I could see the raw hurt in his eyes, the pain he tried so desperately to hide.He wanted to keep this side of him buried, and I could feel how exposed he was, now that I knew.
“I want you to introduce the dungeon to me,” I whispered, my voice trembling with both desire and something deeper.
“Camilla,” he said, his voice strained, as if the mere suggestion was tearing him apart.
“Please, I want to help.I need to do this for you, for us.”
He cupped my face gently, his touch tender yet full of torment.A tear gathered in the corner of his eye, a silent testament to the weight of everything he carried.It rolled down his cheek, and without thinking, I leaned in, kissing it away, my lips brushing the salty trail of his pain.
“Please,” I whispered again, my heart breaking for him, but knowing this was what we both needed.
He hugged me tighter against his body and he shook slightly.A part of me knew that inside, he was breaking.
This was Alfonso.Not the beast.But I wanted to love all of him, and not just parts of him.And his darkness was another side of him.
I let him cry as I lay on his chest.I must have drifted away because when I woke up, I was alone inside the dark room.He must have carried me to our room and let me sleep.
I hated that he didn’t sleep with me anymore.I wasn’t going to lose him over this.I was determined to make it work.To show him that I was stronger than he thought.That I was enough.I would be enough.That I could handle all of him.
I found him asleep on one of the deck chairs, the soft rise and fall of his chest the only movement against the starry night.He looked so peaceful, so unlike the storm he carried inside.
I bit my lower lip as I took him in, the man who was mine, flaws and fire and all.My husband.And whether he was ready or not, he was about to learn exactly what it meant to be loved by a Santore.Fierce.Unyielding.Forever.
I climbed over him and lowered myself onto his lap.He sniffed and jerked awake as his eyes found mine.
“Stop pushing me away.I’m not leaving,” I whispered and then I planted my lips on his and pried his mouth open with my tongue.
The kiss was soft but passionate and then it turned desperate.He sat up with me on the deck chair as my pelvis moved slowly against him.His arousal became mine and soft moans left our throats.I felt whole when I was with him like this.
He was my drug, my cocaine, and I wasn’t ready to go to rehab yet.
THE WHITE RABBIT
My little runaway was fucking me the way only she knew how and there wasn’t a shy hair on her body as we made love right in the open beneath the stars.
Nico or Bas could walk by anytime, but she didn’t give a flying fuck about it.
Her noises filled the deck as she connected hard with my cock time and time again, bouncing faster on top of me.
I grabbed her behind her legs and pushed myself deeper inside of her.
