But I do. My little eight-year-old legs bend and stretch as I maneuver down the thick, twisting trunk of the tree and drop to the dirt in my sparkling sneakers. I open my mouth to call out to my mom and raise one hand to wave when a palm clamps to the back of my skull and shoves me, face-first, into the trunk of the tree.
My forehead slams against the rough bark before I crumble to the ground, dizzy, my head throbbing in pain, blood dripping from my face.
“What are you, a bug?” It’s a teenaged Leo. His dark hair falls loose to his shoulders, and his long, lanky arms are more than enough to catch me. No matter how fast I run. “Climbing trees like the pissant you are.”
Fear animates my limbs as I scramble back from Leo into the bushes. I know my mom can’t see me. She doesn’t know this is happening.
Everything in me wants to scream and cry for help, but if Leo gets in trouble, then my mom and I get in trouble. No matter what happens, Uncle Matteo always takes Leo’s side and insists we’re wrong.
I clench my teeth, swallowing my scream as Leo saunters forward to tower over me. He kicks my foot.
“Dad’s started letting me use the gym here.” Leo’s dark eyes are wild with excitement. “You know, the one all the men use.”
I scoot back until I can’t anymore. A thick, prickly shrub presses into my back. I wrench forward from the sting of its spikey brambles.
“I wanted you to be the first person to see what I’ve learned.” Leo’s toothy grin flips my stomach.
And then he drops to his knees, hunching over me with that wicked grin on his face. He grabs at me with spindly fingers, wrapping them tight around my child-sized neck.
Tears spurt from my eyes. Leo begins to squeeze, his smile becoming more and more twisted. It only takes a second before my air flow is restricted.
I can’t breathe.
“They have these machines in the gym that make my arms stronger. Strong enough to kill little bugs like you,” Leo says with glee.
My mouth drops open, gasping, but no air comes in. I’m shaking with the tension and strain Leo’s pouring into his muscles.
Mama!I scream to her in my mind, but no sound escapes my body. Save me, someone, please!
I jolt awake, drenched in sweat, rasping for breath.
My hand flies to my aching throat.
That nightmare comes along just infrequently enough that I manage to forget about the horrible thing until it sneaks up on me again.
It’s a memory I’ve tried to bury many, many times.
That afternoon where Leo almost got his wish.
When he almost did away with me forever.
In reality, Mae appeared and hauled him off me. She got to me in time. My mother and I both cried when Mae told her what happened.
Crying was all we could do. It wasn’t the first time Leo terrorized me, and as long as his father remained in power, we knew it wouldn’t be the last.
I dab the sweat on my forehead with the t-shirt I’m wearing.
I have no idea what time it is. There’s no clock in here. I obviously don’t have a phone. And outside the bedroom window, the world is still pitch dark, with no hint of periwinkle on the horizon.
It must be the middle of the night.
I’m alone in a locked room, all my demons crowding around me. I wish Rory were here. I’d give anything to be curled up on the bed in his underground office, listening to his steady heartbeat.
The events from earlier in the evening punch me with an iron fist. I already burned that bridge with Rory. Between the lies and the ugly truth, he’ll never look at me the same way again.
Pain twists my heart. As I get lost in my regrets, athumpfrom the door jolts me upright.
I scurry out of my bed, flattening myself against the wall beside the bathroom door. Someone’s in the hall outside my room. It’s probably just the guard who’s always there, or maybe…
