Page 59 of Give & Take
With each step my heart’s tempo increases. “That’s right,” My chest organ’s going like a timpani by the time Raphael reaches us. He thrusts a hand out to Mike.
“Hello,” he says. His voice is unrecognizable. Not aggressive, like it was with Daniel. But not warm either. Miles away from any of the multitudes of tones he uses with me.
From theHey, LanatoI’m just going to say hi to your mom.Or,Hey, Sunshine.
Not that he uses that anymore.
“Raphael LaForest,” Raphael says. “You must be Mike. I’ve heard a lot about you.”
It’s neutral. Respectful.
“From your girls,” Raphael elaborates. His eyes dart to mine, and there’s a reassurance there. AnI’m here. I’m okay, you’re okay.
Mike takes a second like he’s still sorting this out in his head. He looks Raphael up and down like he’s some kind of model.
Then Nova appears. “Dad. Raphael’s taking care of us for the summer while mom’s at work. He’s really fun and we like him.”
Bless her.
“Yeah!” Aurora says from where she’s already trying to take a seat on one of the slides. She sinks right down to the grass, giggling. “You should be his friend, Dad. Because you’re both boys.”
The thought is so ludicrous I laugh out loud.
Mike glares at me.
“You hired a male nanny,” Mike says to me. It’s like an accusation.
Raph doesn’t blink.
“Is there an issue with that?” I ask. “Raphael came highly recommended. He’s exceptional with the kids. Treats them like they’re his own.”
Raphael’s eyes snap to mine.
Fuck. I don’t know why I said that. My breathing feels shallow.
But suddenly, Mike laughs. It’s a big, booming laugh. “Whew!” he says. He’s having trouble breathing. He setshis hands on his hips and says to Nova, “For a minute there I thought your mom got herself a little boy-toy!”
“Mike!” I say, mortified.
Nova frowns. “What’s a boy-t?—”
“Your dad’s making a very bad joke,” I say. “That’s not funny atall. In fact, it’s completely inappropriate.”
It’s good to be mad. It helps squash my nerves.
When I look over at Raphael, his eyes are on me. His jaw is flexing, and I can see the question there.Are you okay?Or maybe,can I please hand him his ass—with words?It doesn’t matter that Mike’s a lawyer used to talking. Raphael would still destroy him.
Raphael’s look is clear: he’ll be a gentleman, but only so long as I want him to be.
I give him the slightest shake of my head, telling him I’ve got this.
He hesitates, like he doesn’t like this one bit, but says tightly, “Nice to meet you, Mike.” To me, he says, “Lana.” I think if we were in the Wild West and he was wearing a hat, he’d tip it, with one hand still on his gun in case Mike made any sudden moves.
He says goodbye to the girls separately before heading for the stairs to his place.
Mike turns to me, muttering, “Jesus, Lana, you’re really?—”
“We’re having a barbecue tonight,” I blurt out to Raphael’s back. “Did you want to join us?”
