Page 48 of Play With Me
My face heats. I told Sasha once when we were talking about birth control how I got an IUD after my last boyfriend. He’d begged me to get it, even though I already knew I didn’t love him and never would. I didn’t end up getting it for him, but I got it after, feeling extra strongly like I wanted to make sure I wouldn’t make any bigger mistakes with the duds I was dating than dating them in the first place.
But I’d never put it to use.
Now, Sasha was suggesting I should—with Jude! I clutch my phone to my chest. “Sasha, I could never.”
“Nora, it’s laid out before you on a fucking platter. It couldn’t be easier.”
I think back to that conversation I had with Callie way back before I left. I think back to all those times I said no to perfect opportunities. All those times I was scared, missing out on life because I refused to stick my neck out even a little bit? She’s right, this is easy.
And I could end up sleeping with Jude.
Would that be so bad?
There’s a dull ache in my chest at the thought of being with him that way, but not actuallybeingwith him. Because I know it’s not just sex I want with Jude.
But my body, thrumming with excitement over all the ways this does make sense, takes charge. “Okay,” I whisper.
“Okay?” Sasha grabs my hands. “You’re going to go? Yes,” she corrects herself. “It’s not a question. You’re going to go.” She throws her arms around me, squeezing me so tight I nearly gag. “Now if I recall correctly,” she says, pulling away, “your train leaves in a matter of hours. So I’ll be over in an hour to help you pack.”
“Sasha— “
“No arguments!” Then she grins and slams the door in my face.
I walk back to my flat with sweaty palms. What if Jude doesn’t remember I’m coming?
You’ll remind him.
I grip my hands into fists, urging that brave voice in my head to grow louder. Because the truth is I’m sick of being scared, and timid, and waiting for things to happen instead of making them happen myself.
I push into the room, ready to make plans with Jude about everything. But when I get inside, I hear the distinct splatter of water on tile.
And I see the door to my bathroom is slightly ajar. Oh God. He’s even more naked. I crane my neck to the strip of space where the door should be closed, then slap myself to turn away.
“Jude?” I call, my voice not quite loud enough as usual.
“Nor?”
Except Jude hears me. He always hears me. “Just a sec, Nor. I’ll be right out.”
The water goes on another couple of minutes. I hustle into the kitchen and quickly rinse out my coffee pot, scooping coffee into the filter with a slightly shaking hand.
“Hey,” Jude says just as I’m pouring the water in. It splashes on the counter. I make a ridiculous squawking sound and turn around.
Jude’s standing in my kitchen, a towel slung low on his hips.
Sasha’s words echo in my ears.Holy shit.
He’s more covered up than he was in his shorts, but somehow this look is much more…sexual. Water streams down his chest, running in rivulets over the ridges of his—
“Sorry, I’m dripping, aren’t I?”
Jude grabs the part of his towel folded into itself and lifts it up, swiping at his stomach. The whole thing is dangerously close to falling apart, and I truly don’t think Jude would even notice or care, until he saw I was offended.
I turn back to the coffee as much to avoid perving on him as to hide the flame in my cheeks. How did I stand being around him before?
“Jude, you’re standing naked in my kitchen, aren’t you?”
“No, my towel’s on. Want to see?”
