Holland doesn’t need any more convincing than the steely look I’m sure is in my eyes.
“Yes, ma’am.”
He grabs hold of the pocket of my sweatshirt and pulls me flush with him. Maybe it’s the combination of the rain water and theheat we’re generating with the friction of his body against mine, but I swear, I’ve been electrocuted…and he hasn’t even kissed me yet. I tip my chin up, waiting, and when he closes the gap between our lips, it’s like lightning strikes.
Fire runs under my skin, heating me from the inside out. Holland slants his mouth against mine, taking my demand to warm me up very seriously.
His hands are everywhere, all at once, running up and down my arms, dragging tender lines down my back, reaching up to redirect my mouth in better alignment with his, and then they’re wrapping around me and lifting me off the ground. I cling to him, relishing how the muscles I’ve seen at work on the golf course are being put to use in a totally different way. I press my fingers into his back, trying to draw him closer. He spins us and walks me backward until my legs connect with the front end of his car. He sets me down gently, not breaking our kiss. I lay back, and he cages his body over mine. He nuzzles his nose into the crook of my neck, placing warm, open-mouthed kisses on the underside of my jaw.
“You are everything, Mal.” His voice is ragged, and he moves so he’s staring directly down at me, propping himself up on his elbows. The desire and reverence in his gaze arrests my breathing. “I’ve wanted you so badly for so long, it’s like my desire has flowed deep down into my bones and latched itself onto my marrow. I…” he shakes he head, looking dazed. “I can’t believe I get to be with you right now. To kiss you like this.”
I reach up and trace a water rivulet as it runs down his cheek, cupping his face with my hands. “Believe it,” I whisper, gently pulling his mouth back down to mine. I kiss him slowly, languidly, deeply—giving us both time to savor the connection that’s at once new and familiar. In a lot of ways, falling for Holland feels inevitable. Like it’s crazy we haven’t done this before because it feels so right. I feel at home in his arms, and whenhis thumbs press possessively into my collarbone, I smile into his mouth, breaking the kiss, so I can get a good look at him.
“What?” he asks, his brown eyes hooded with desire but also alert, like he wants to make sure I’m okay.
“Nothing.” I smile more shyly, because under his gaze I feel completely seen. “I just think I’m going to like being yours.”
Holland’s breath hitches, and he pulls me back up to a seated position. His hands go to my hair, and he tugs on my ponytail.
“Can I take this out?” he asks. When I nod, he starts trying to undo my hair tie, but everything is a tangle. The rain is making my wavy hair a mess, I’m sure. It’s impossible for me to yank my hair tie out on a good day, so when Holland grunts with frustration and impatience a moment later, I reach my hands up and take the tie out on my own.
My hair cascades down around my face, and Holland pulls back. I reach for him, but he holds out his hand, keeping me close but at enough of a distance that he can study me.
“Let me look at you for a second.”
“Why?” I shake my head.
“Because you’re beautiful. And…you want to be mine.”
My bones turn to noodles, and it’s a good thing I’m sitting down, or I think I would fall over. He reaches out and delicately takes a single strand, running it between his fingers. He stares at me with awe, eyelashes sticking together in triangular clumps, making him look boyish. The wonder in his gaze could power a thousand stars, and I almost can’t breathe at all when he stares at me like this.
“I love how you look with your hair down.” He smiles at me, and it’s bashful, like he can’t believe he’s admitting that out loud.
I scrunch up my nose, absently patting my frizzing hair. “Why?” I ask again.
He shrugs, still studying me like I’m a brand-new land and he’s the one lucky enough to see it for the first time. “Because I’vealways thought your hair is a lot like you. Fiery, but held back, kept in check.”
He reaches out and takes my hand away from where I’m self-consciously smoothing everything down, setting it in my lap. Then he takes both hands and runs his fingers through my hair above either side of my ears. He places gentle kisses on both of my ear lobes.
“I hope you’ll feel safe enough around me to let yourself burn freely,” he whispers. “Don’t hold yourself back with me, okay?”
He kisses one cheek, and as he moves to kiss the other, I turn my head and capture his mouth with mine, ratcheting the heat of our kiss back up and showing him my response.
I have never kissed anyone in my life like I’m kissing Holland. I feel powerful and in control and completely taken care of all at the same time. It’s freeing and exciting, and I don’t want to go back to living in the shadows of my life, hiding away.
I think I would be content to be out here all night, kissing and laughing and teasing Holland. Getting to know him in a new and more meaningful way. Fuller and more completely. Being cherished by him. Dreaming of a future full of this.
But then an SUV drives by, splashing rainwater puddles all over us.
We pull apart, spluttering and laughing.
I swear, it’s like I’m living in a movie right now, and I am so here for this leading-lady role.
40
Five Million Dollars
Holland
