Mason smiled. “Because it’s one thing to agree to a quick legal wedding,” he replied. “And another thing to stand up in front of your friends and family.” He shrugged. “It just feels bigger.”
“Why?” I asked him, confused.
He shrugged again. “No idea, but Ward and I had already gotten married before our ceremony, too. In the hospital, with a lovely chaplain we ended up inviting to the full wedding. I was still nervous, and he was an absolute wreck.”
I frowned. “Is it a problem that I’mnotnervous?” I asked.
Ray laughed again. “Give it a few hours,” he replied cheerfully.
I hatedthat Ray had been right.
By the time the actual feather ceremony happened, I was terrified. Not of being bound to Elliot—never that—but of messing up something I was supposed to do. Saying something wrong, doing something wrong, somehow sticking my foot in it and offending the entire Menominee Nation…
I knew Elliot would probably still love me even if I did do one of those things, but he’d be disappointed, and that was the last thing I wanted to do.
But I hadn’t messed anything up, Henry had kept winking at me through the whole thing, and nobody had seemed particularly upset at the big white guy being brought into the Menominee community.
It had helped that Hart was there with Elliot, looking about as awkward as I’d felt, and that, before the whole thing started, he’d sidled up to me and whispered, “They’re very tolerant of us tall white guys. Just do whatever anybody tells you, and you’ll be fine.”
I’d been given a red button-down trimmed in red, white, yellow, and black ribbon at the straight collar and cuffs, which I wore with black slacks. Hart had a white one with similar trim, Noah one in black.
Elliot, however, wore a ribbon shirt that was mostly red, but with the other three colors in patterned ribbons that ran the length of his sleeves, down the front, and around the collar, cuffs, and hem of the shirt. He also wore leggings rather than slacks, soft leather boots with bead- and quill-work, danglingbeaded earrings, and had ribbons and feathers braided into his hair.
He looked stunning.
Other than Henry, who had performed the ceremony itself, everyone else there was in a mix of clothing—many of the Nation members, including Shira, wore a combination of traditional Menominee and modern American semi-formal wear, and my friends and the Harts were just in their usual American wedding attire—suits, skirts, dresses, slacks and dress shirts with a vest or sweater.
When I imagined it, I’d expected that most of the people there would be Elliot’s friends, family, extended family, Nation members, and maybe a few people I knew. Noah, certainly, and Lulu.
But I’d had plenty of people grinning back at me when I’d walked in—Helen and Ray had come out, as had James Humbolt and his wife Lynda, Quincy and Aaron, Taavi and Lulu (because Hart and Noah were standing with us), Mason and Wardandall three kids… But even more than that, Gale Smith, Ronda Eichman, Lacy Krinke, and Roger Marcks from the Shawano PD and Sheriff’s Office had all been there, Nathaniel Rivers, Kitty Matuszack, Burce Demain, and Lieutenant Robin Colfax from the fire investigation squad, and even Dan Maza had come out with Quincy and Aaron. It was a lot more people than I’d thought would want to see me get married.
A lot more people than I’d ever thought I would be able to call friends.
The ceremony itself had been mid-afternoon, and dinner had been served as the sun set, painting the sky with color. The buffet tables had been overloaded with both traditional Menominee and traditional Wisconsin foods, everything from duck and venison and smoked fish to macaroni and cheese, bratwurst, and sauerkraut.
Nobody went even a little bit hungry.
Several bonfires had been lit as the light completely faded from the sky, and Judy Hart and Henry broke out the largest spread of s’mores ingredients I’d ever seen, including all three ingredients in vegan versions just for me.
For most of my life, I’d expected to just get by. To hopefully find someone willing to put up with my quirks and foibles, someone who would be willing to make space for me in their life. I’d expected to be satisfied with my work and hoped to find comfort in my personal life. Security.
In Elliot, I’d found so much more. So muchbetter. I hadn’t had to change who I was to make him happy, although loving him had changed me. Yes, I’d moved halfway across the country for him, but he’d not just made space for me, butremadethe space to fit me.
I’d never understood the difference before.
Never understood what it meant that someone would always put me first. That we had a sloping ramp off the back porch—just finished last week—so that it would be easier on my knees to go out into the garden, and that I hadn’t asked for it. Elliot had just designed it in.
He never complained that I couldn’t eat certain things, and never made a big deal out of cooking food that both of us could share. Sure, he’d get a burger or cheese curds when we went out, and there was still dairy in the fridge for sandwiches and such, but our meals were always something I could eat, no complaints, no sighs.
And whenever I came home after a full night of fire fighting or a crime scene or the scene of an accident—like last night—there was always food waiting for me, either in the oven or in the fridge, even if Elliot wasn’t there when I got back.
He was the first thing I thought of in the morning, and the last thing I breathed in at night, and I knew, for the first time in my life, that I was that to him, too.
I jumped a little when a pair of warm, rough, familiar hands settled on my hips.
“Sorry, baby,” came Elliot’s murmur. I turned, lifting an arm so that he could tuck himself under my shoulder, one arm still around my waist. “I didn’t mean to scare you.”
I kissed his temple. “Just lost in my own head,” I replied.
