“This is your scheduled wake-up call,” Dawn’s voice called from behind the door. “Good morning, you two! See you downstairs soon.”
Then her footsteps grew further away.
Welp. No lying to each other now. We officially couldn’t pretend we didn’t know the other was awake.
Clearing his throat, Lucas slowly unlatched every body part of his that was one with mine. Eyes open, I rolled off onto my back and stared at the ceiling, which felt safer. I could see him fall back on his back from the corner of my eye.
My treacherous lady bits were swollen and begging to be filled, clenching for something long and hard. Well, too bad. Suck it up! I mean, no. Don’t suck anything. We’re not doing any sucking.Frik.Now I was picturing—nope. Stop that.
“Morning.” He broke the silence first.
“Morning,” I croaked, then rolled my eyes.Nice, Li. Way to be cool.
“Gonna take a shower,” he said, rolling off the bed.
“Mm-hm,” was all I managed, only peeking at his glorious ass in the sleep pants that did nothing to hide how spectacular that view was. I sighed when it disappeared through the bathroom door.
“Yup,” I said to myself. “Okay.” I got out of bed and prepped my clothes and toiletries for when he got out, and I could hop in.
It was a fun, awkward little dance, avoiding touching each other when he finished, and I rushed in, closing the door a bit too hard. We both got ready, packed, and Jeremy was already in the room when I came out from doing my hair and makeup to help take the bags to the car. We said our goodbyes to Dawn. She gave the best hugs.
“You two take good care of each other, you hear?” She told us as she hugged a reluctant Lucas.
Jeremy and him seemed to have this telepathic male conversation with their eyes. We headed to Kathy’s for breakfast, and surprisingly, it was a companionable silence. We ate, looked out the window as the day came alive, and relaxed into the next part of our trip.
About fifteen minutes on the highway, I asked, “What’s our next stop?”
Lucas glanced over before answering. “Basic Plaines. It’s about eight, eight and a half hours out.”
I nodded, tapping an anxious rhythm on my knee, which I had propped up on the seat. “We stopping before that?”
“We’ll probably need to gas up halfway there. We can gear up, and use the bathroom then. Unless you have to before,” he added.
“Sounds good. I’m fine for now.”
He grunted and nodded, focused on the road.
Connecting my phone to his car, I took control of the road music. I was ready for it before it happened. Lucas’s eyes slowly met mine in agonized disbelief, and my smile was a mile wide.
“You’re kidding, right?”
Laughing, I sang along asI'm Every Womanby Whitney Houston played loud through his speakers. Paying attention to the road, Lucas shook his head, but I could see his lips twitch. The man was trying not to smile. Suddenly, it was my sole duty to get that man to crack a smile. Dancing in my seat, I swayed my shoulders back and forth, singing passionately off-key. His lips tightened into a straight line. Smiling huge, I leaned over and sang at his profile. Lucas turned his face, narrowing his eyes at me, but we both froze when his lips practically grazed mine. I sucked in a sharp breath, but my body didn’t pull away. Our noses were touching while Whitney sang to us in the background.
His eyes flicked down to my lips, which were parted. So low, I almost missed it, Lucas groaned, tightening his grip on the steering wheel. I could hear the whine of the leather before he sharply turned his attention back to the road. Exhaling the breath lodged in my throat, I straighten back into my seat, lowering the song from my phone.
We rode in that tension through three of my road trip playlist songs. No reaction from him. I was painstakingly playing out conversations that I could start to break this thick wall in the car when he surprised the hell out of me.
“What do you,” he started, but collected his thoughts first. “Where do you think your grandmother is now?”
Gasping in air, my body locked from the sudden assault.
“Shit,” he said, looking over. “I’m sorry. Forget I asked. That was insensitive.” He shook his head, his brow tightly furrowed.
Watching his reaction, I wanted to soothe him, even against my own denial of emotions I’d preferred keeping locked away. Searching my mind, I asked myself the same question. I didn’t want to bullshit him. After last night, something honest passed between us. It felt sacred.
“It’s tricky,” I started softly. Lucas’s body became very still. I knew I had his undivided attention.” For us, at least, in Chinese culture, it’s considered bad luck or a disrupter to the harmony of living to speak directly about death.” I chuckled, remembering. “Of course, as traditional as lao lao was,” I glanced at Lucas, “my grandmother.” He nodded, still looking ahead. “She loved being a secret-not-so-secret rebel. Those last few months,” I paused, my throat tightening. I startled at the tender touch from his hand that settled on my hand that was on my lap. He gently squeezed in support. I turned my palm to hold his in return, like my anchor.
“We talked about how in tradition, we have altars and rituals done to honor elders and ancestors who have passed.” I shook my head, more to dislodge the emotion. My eyes welled up, wanting to release. “She told me,“Li. Don’t dwell on keeping me alive.”His hand tensed in mine.“Nothing you do or don’t do will ever change how much I love you. How proud I am of you.”My chest hitched, holding back the sob.“Live,she said.I had my time. It’s your turn now.”
