Page 67 of Brian and Mina's Holiday Hits
The muscle in Brian’s jaw clenches. “You know that’s not true. So will you do it?”
He holds my gaze, and there is so much pleading in his eyes. I’ve thought about this before. Not punishing him quite like this, and not domming him in the standard way, but giving him release from some of his demons. I know the power of that dungeon when used appropriately and the catharsis that can come when given the space to cry without someone asking ‘What’s wrong?’
I want to give that to Brian, because although I don’t believe he deserves to be punished, I know he needs this for his own reasons.
“Will things go back to normal between us if I do?”
His dark gaze holds mine for a long time until finally he nods.
“Okay.”
He lets out a breath. “Okay.”
He walks past me out of our room.
“What? Right now?”
“Yes, right now, Mina. I need this right fucking now.”
I follow him into Cell A, and he’s already stripping down. When he’s fully bare, he walks with purpose to the St. Andrew’s Cross. He looks over his shoulder at me, a question in his gaze.
I let out a long breath. I can’t believe we’re here, that he isn’t just letting me punish him, but actively asking for it. I don’t know how to feel about any of this. I just need for things to go back the way they were between us before tonight.
I cross the room and secure his arms and legs. I trail my fingertips over the scars of his back—scars stretched and faded by time, given to him in his childhood. I press a kiss over one of the cigarette burn marks.
“What do you want me to use?” I ask quietly.
“Lady’s choice.”
I go to the large box of toys and implements and scan the various crops, whips and floggers hanging on hooks on the wall.
“Mina?”
“Yeah?”
“Do you remember how you were that day with the less impressive Matsumoto?”
I snort at this description. “Yes.”
“I need you to be her.”
“Okay.”
I don’t know what I’m going to use, but I feel so exposed with Brian watching me, so I take a black length of cloth from the box. I blindfold him and run my fingertip along his jawline.
“Let’s let it be a surprise,” I whisper.
I’m also offering him space and privacy for this. It’s not lost on me the enormous amount of trust he’s placing in me right now, to allow himself to be this vulnerable, to so utterly and completely reverse our roles—even if for only a moment.
Things have been different with us for a long time. I don’t think either of us truly sees me as his slave anymore. It’s an act we put on for the house—something which preserves Brian’s reputation. It’s a role I’m more than willing to play with the man who saved me in every way a person could be saved.
In private we’re partners in crime, and in the bedroom the power flows back and forth between us with ease. But this is something else entirely. It’s not the playful way we’ve been together, and I feel a duty to Brian to take this seriously. He’s seeking penance, absolution, for a supposed crime I’ve already forgiven him for, but I’m worried he won’t be able to forgive himself.
I run my fingertips over the supple leather of one of the whips. I select one and cross back over to Brian. I just standthere and stare at his back, hypnotized by the criss-crossing scars.
A long time passes.
“Mina?”
