Page 52 of Generation Omega: Claimed
He’s concentrating so intently it either hurts or maybe he has some mad indigestion. Unfortunately, his dumb scowl is more manly than I’ve ever been, even when I went as him for Halloween a few times. I never plan to share that I’ve gotten laid more than a dozen times because of my willingness to role play as Gideon Blake, including as that serial killer who inspired some freaky gals to spread their legs. He better not be hearing my thoughts right now.
“It’s not your thoughts,” Gideon finally declares,creepily, “but I have this awareness that you’re not okay. Something got stirred up in you, and myfirst alphasenses are tingling, alerting me that a packmate is troubled.”
I’m gaping at him—buck-naked gaping—and can’t find a single word for him. I’m preoccupied with stomping out all thoughts before they attract his attention.
“On one hand,” Gideon continues, “this is good. If thisskillhad been operational, I could have tied Thatcher to that railing and forced some bark therapy on him. On the other hand, it’s more than a little disturbing.” His chuckle is dark. “The thought of having Thatcher in my head—that wasn’t in the fine print.”
“Kazimir is going to kill him, don’t you think?” Did that sound too gleeful?Whatever, I’m not saying it again or thinking anything ever.
“Probably.” Gideon’s definitely in the land of muddled feelings regarding Thatcher’s fate, but his wise glare latches onto me like an alien leech. My Thatcher diversion failed, and the first alpha is waiting.
“What’s the absolute minimum I can say to get you to leave me alone?” I’m totally a snotty, teenaged mutant, and he’s the professor of this all-mutant omegaverse academy.
“Well, how about you tell me the truth? I don’t need all the details, just an overview so I know what we’re dealing with. Remember, there’s noIinpack.”
“No, but there’s aUinfuck you—two actually.”
Gideon delivers a baleful look and strums his fingers on his crossed arms, his muscles bulging. I sense a bark, possibly a roar, in my near future. “Jameson, we’ve learned the hard way what any weakness in the alphas can do to Tillie. I can’t let that happen again—I won’t.”
I turn my back on the cabin and grab hold of my favorite railing in the world. “I didn’t think she would remember my sappy biography when I bonded her. I got the full show of her life, but Ory released the omega kraken, and I thought I’d dodged the nostalgia-laced bullet. I don’t know whether Tillie’sremembering or that damn pussy-monster omega is feeding her intel, but hearing her thoughts about…”
“Your mom—I hear it too.” Dammit, now he’s playing empathy roulette, and I’m doomed. Compassionate Gideon Blake wins all the awards for a reason.
Is there any sense in concealing anything? It will probably just inspire the manipulative omegaverse to target me with more direct hits. “I don’t think about it—I don’t think about her. I drink. I fuck. I sleep, usually medicated. I don’tthink.”
Both of us know that Tillie is still musing about my mother’s nickname for me, imagining what it would be like to call me by that name. I don’t understand why she’s fixating on it, but that’s another lie. I pushed her off balance and gave her a piece of foundation that felt truly solid. The fact that I don’t love her only made that foundation and the bond between us stronger. She doesn’t trust love—no, that’s not right. She adores Ethan and is certain about his love.
I play with the idea in my head, batting it around a few times. Why would she cling harder to the man who doesn’t love her and forced her submission? Is it the lure of the chase? Capturing the unattainable guy? As soon as I think that, I discount it. That’s not who she is.
My hand raises and covers my heart. Fuck. She’s there too. Tender beats that irreparably merged with mine when we bonded.
Gideon and I remain there, viewing Tillie’s thoughts that lead us toward the truth. This isn’t about capturing me or connecting with her new alpha. This is about the past, what she always imagined about my mother and me—a recurring thought that troubled her after my mother died, something tied to the nightmare that was Tillie’s early life.
Jamie. Tillie plays it over and over, and then my heart might as well fucking die. It’s the tone, the warmth, the sassymischief that defined my mother. Tillie’s never heard her own name spoken with that kind of infinite love from any woman or mother figure. Even though she’s a few years younger than me, Tillie knew about my mother and saw her funeral—everyone did. It was plastered on screens all over the world. She remembers being jealous, even after I lost everything, because, at least, I knew love.
Damn. Fuck. Hell. I don’t know what to do with this. Alphas are supposed to take care of their omegas—that’s the rule. But an unavoidable realization lands, no matter how I seek to evade it. The lighthouse in me that went dark when my mother died—the one that’s supposed to be gone forever—is back. Because Tillie, my damn omega, lit that beacon, sending light, love, and warmth right through the core of all that’s dead and buried inside me.
I’m almost grateful when I feel Tillie’s discomfort and have the perfect reason to escape Gideon’s attempt atnanny-hood.
“Sorry, man,” I say, clapping him on the back, “but I’ve got a bondmark to tend.”
“Prick,” Gideon snaps, but he had first dibs and decided to be a classy fuck about his bondmark placement. I’m going to let the haters hate—not my problem. It’s not like he can fault me for performing my sworn duty to eat out the best cunt in the universe.
Before I reach the living room, Gideon mutters under his breath, “Enjoy your distraction while you can, because you and I aren’t finished.”
I spin and face him. “Who’s making lunch… or dinner? Why don’t you use all your upper-management skills to get right on that? Actually, you and Ethan can take care of that, since Mackenzie and I have bondmarks to tend—sacred duty and all.”
I’m practically skipping as I move toward Tillie. I sweep her up and set her knees on Mackenzie’s hefty thighs, with her chest toward him and her reddened ass right in my face.
“Arch that back, sweetness—I have work to do, and so do you.”
CHAPTER 28
KAZIMIR
It’s crushing, like being trapped in a car as it goes through a smasher, something I’ve observed with amusement from the other side of the agony. Now, I’m in the car as it collapses around me—that’s what leaving Ethan does to me. All this space, the expanse of sea and sky, and all I feel is crunching metal, my shape unrecognizable as my questionable good intentions become the weapons that tear me apart.
I’m not whining—that’s what I tell myself, while cursing aloud at the endless ocean and the asshole who sent me wandering through it. But I had to go, didn’t I? Ethan needs time, as much as I can provide, to make the decision that will affect this pack and the omegaverse in unpredictable ways.
