Page 23 of Changing Caleb
“Yeah? But I’m the only one who actually wanted it.”
She storms out, her words ringing in my ears. She thinks I didn’t want our child. She couldn’t be more wrong.
26
Casey
Itake a deep breath as I exit the storage closet and smooth my t-shirt down as I walk back out into the restaurant. I meet Lilly's eyes just in time for them to dart downward as she wipes the bar.
“It was nothing,” I let her know, praying she doesn’t try and convince me otherwise.
“That wasn’t nothing,” she replies.So much for my prayers.
“I’m with Derek now. I love him.”
Even as the words come out of my mouth, I know they aren’t true. I want to love him.Shouldlove him. But I can’t.
“I think you care about Derek, and maybe you think you should love him, but you can’t do that while you still have feelings for Caleb.”
Is this bitch reading my damn mind or something? As much as I try and deny it, I’ll probably always have feelings for Caleb. He was my first...everything.
“I may still have feelings for Caleb, but that relationship is over. It was a disaster, and I wasted years of my life on him. Ihave a great guy now. One who treats me like I deserve to be treated.”
“Well, if things were perfect with Derek, what I just saw wouldn’t have happened.”
She’s right. I wanted Caleb’s hands on me. When his hands unzipped my jeans, I didn’t want him to stop. I wouldn’t have stopped him, and I was annoyed we were interrupted until I realized I was about to make a huge mistake.
“It won’t be happening again. I swear it.”
Lilly gives me a sympathetic smile. “It’s not me you have to make promises to, Casey.”
She opens her mouth to say something more, but Jade interrupts, bursting through the door in haste. She was supposed to be here almost an hour ago.
“Sorry I’m late! I swear, this wedding planning has really taken its toll on me.”
“Obviously,” I tease, arching an eyebrow at her hair. “You did brush your hair, right?”
Her eyes go wide. “Oh my God. No!”
“Okay, no need to panic. Just run up to my room and do whatever you need to do.”
Lilly motions toward the stairs. Once Lilly decided to stay in Hollis, she rented the apartment above the bar. In this town, there aren’t many options. She’s actually going to school in Redbud with Jade and me now.
“Much better,” I laugh when she rejoins us.
Her long blonde hair is now in a neat braid over her shoulder. She flashes me a smile. “How’d lunch go? Doesn’t look like it was too busy.”
“Not at all,” Lilly replies, eyeing me to see if I’m going to fess up to Jade.
I probably should. In fact, I should probably tell her everything. She may understand my reasoning for not givingCaleb another chance when I’ve done that in that past so many times. It’s just that talking about it hurts so much. I had only just found out I was pregnant. Didn’t really have time for it to even sink in.
But then I told Caleb, and he didn’t take it well. I thought he might be happy. You know, scared, but happy. He was worried about the timing. The crew didn’t have a lot of jobs lined up at the time. He was still living at his parents’ house. I barely made ends meet with my tips from Jack’s. All valid points. Still, it was a baby...our baby.
I screamed at him, like I’ve been known to do, and told him it was over. I’d raise the baby alone if I had to. I didn’t expect him to take me seriously. To run off and run straight to Tori.
He may be a changed man, but I haven’t changed. I haven’t healed. I don’t know that I ever will.
27
