By the look he gives me, one that demands to be heard with no warmth to his blues, it’s a warning I finally take.
He walks around the front of the truck, his eyes never leaving mine. He runs the back of his hand over his bleeding mouth and then spits blood. When he gets in, he slams his door shut. I jump at the sound and then the sky lights up with a sudden bolt of lightning followed by the booming crack of thunder.
“You’re an asshole!” I don’t give up because damn it, he’s going to fucking hear me.
“I am.” He nods. “I don’t know why you expected anything else of me.”
Sometimes I’m afraid Grayer’s crazy. Most bull riders are I guess. They have to be to saddle up for an eight-second ride on a one-ton beast.
Sensing he’s not in the mood for provoking, I wait until he’s not driving. He throws the truck into gear and peels out of the gravel parking lot spraying up rocks in his wake. He takes me about a mile down the road to a hotel room.
“Don’t you dare run away from me when I stop this truck.” There’s no mistaking the warning in his voice. “This storm isn’t going to just blow over and it’s not safe out here.”
Though it’s certainly tempting to run away from him, I don’t. I touch my neck, tears rolling down my cheeks. It’s gone. The one piece of Grandpa Lee I had left, and my decisions destroyed it.
We get inside the hotel room and I want to strip away my wet clothes, but I also don’t want to in front of Grayer. Fuck him. He doesn’t get to see me naked anymore. Maybe never again.
I collapse on the floor near the bed, crying, and he slams the hotel door shut with his foot. With frustration, he tosses his wallet and keys on the table by the door and then rips his wet shirt over his head. It slaps against the floor and then he leans back into the door, sliding down to a seated position and bringing his knees to his chest. “Fuck!” he shouts, pulling at his hair.
I see it right then, he’s hurting and on the verge of either blowing up or falling to his knees. It’s a good thing he’s on the ground already because I’m pretty sure it’s the falling that he’s about to do.
