Page 91 of The Legend
My front wheels clipping dad’s, the white hard concretewall, flipping along the backstretch, the catch fence and then the ground.
Oh godwhat did I do?
“M...m...my...d...a...,” speech was an effort, one Ididn’t have.
I couldn’t force out any more than that. I couldn’t evenmake the thought completely form in my head or find my voice to utter thewords. My head pounded, a sharp, blazing spike being driven through my skullinto my brain like a hammer driving a nail. I felt the hot liquid again,pouring over my scalp down my back. Dripping and wet. I tasted blood, lots ofblood and vomited again. I could feel the blood coming from my nose mixing withdirt.
An echoing fire scorched my chest, my lungs, and everyheartbeat felt heavy, forced. The blood pumped rapidly throughout mecounteracting with the adrenaline pulsating in my muscles and joints begging toheal. There was no healing right now, only hurting.
I couldn’t bear to think that I caused the wreck. Icouldn’t have.
Was he even alive? If I feltthis, what was he feeling?
“Ok-k-k-kay...,” I croaked, struggling to makemy body obey. I just had to know, and then I could fall apart, but every wordwas a hideous effort. “M-y-y-y...d...ad...?”
Why couldn’t I form words?
“The safety crew is helping him.” The voice was Axel, Ithink. “Just stay still dad, please.”
“Jameson?” another voice was beside my ear, I felt the coolbreeze and more pain at the sound. “We need you to remain still. Please try notto move.”
“O...k-k-k...a...y?” I tried again to get up, to move, to look around, getsome bearing on my surroundings, but...fuckI couldn’t do anything. My body wouldn’t respond to even thebasic commands.
I managed to get my arms underneath me, but I had nocontrol over them, no strength.
I collapsed and my head hit something hard.
I wanted to scream with the pain swallowing me, but Icouldn’t. My will, whatever was left of it was begging this feeling to stop. Icouldn’t see. Everything appeared distorted, blurry and smoggy.
I could fall apart later, not now though, I kept telling myself.
Axel’s voice was at me ear again. “You guys tangled comingout of two when Grandpa got up against the wall.”
I wrecked with him?Oh god, this couldn’t bereal.It’s not real, no, I won’t let it be.
I tried to move once again but the pain shook me through mycore this time, palpitating rapidly around my ears and eyes. I screamed, but nosound came.
“Dad,” Axel asked frantically. He was scared. “Can you moveyour legs?”
I tried to shift, to prove myself wrong, but somethingshifted inside my chest and it felt like someone placed a thousand pounds on mychest. The pain was instant, blinding again. Grunting in pain, I fought onceagain not to pass out. At this point, passing out was what I wanted. I couldn’tcontinue to feel this. I wanted to pass out. I begged for it. I need it.
I vomited as the agony increased instead of lessening, andthe vomiting only made it worse with the retching movements. I couldn’t endurethis much longer, I was sure of that. I started to panic as I realized I waseither going to pass out soon or maybe even die unless someone helped me. Icouldn’t let that happen. I couldn’t leave Sway and the kids. I couldn’t leavemy family.
“Jameson, we need to transport you to the hospital.” Avoice said. “You have a severe open head injury. Please stay as still aspossible.”
No wonder I hurt so badly.
When I could faintly see my surroundings, I heard theparamedics hurried around me, but I couldn’t see them around dads’ car. Themangled chaos of destroyed sprint cars obscured my views of him, but I couldfaintly see his prone figure.
Icould feel the pain in my head, my chest, my stomach, in my entire body. Itpounded away in the background, waiting for its chance to take over and consumeevery last piece of me. I held it off as I needed to know dad was okay.
Isaw him clearly after a moment but he wasn’t moving, nothing, just lyingperfectly still.
Igave up.
Icouldn’t take the pain any longer.
Attrition – Axel
