Page 177 of The Champion
“I don’t know what I would do without you and daddy.”
“I know...”
The kids never really needed comfort when it came to howreal the possibility was to them losing their father each week.
They never complained though. When I think about my kidsand the childhood they’ve had so far, I can’t think of any time when they’vesaid they feel neglected or they miss us. Jameson may race a lot and sure, wedon’t see him for weeks at a time but that’s always been our life. They don’tknow any different just like Jameson didn’t growing up.
All the things I loved about my childhood, my mom,Charlie, I found those things in my life now...withJameson and our family.
I knew I shouldn’t be mad at Jameson for lying to me. Hewas protecting me from the evil pit lizards. I understood that. But it hurtthat he didn’t feel he could tell me. Jameson knew me well enough to know Iwasn’t jealous of them. What made him think I couldn’t handle it?
No one wants a marriage to fail, who would? And no, Ididn’t think my marriage was a failure at all. All this just made me thinkabout it in general. Even a good marriage can fail but I like to think that itbegan with a miracle. A miracle that should never be forgot.
You fell in love.
That is what you should always remember. Remember why youfell in love. Remember that feeling you got when you knew you loved them andremember the feeling you got when you knew they loved you back. That’s whatkeeps the marriage from failing.
I remember the exact moment I fell in love with Jameson.It was in the pits at Knoxville. I also remember when I finally realized heloved me back that night in Savannah.
Even though Jameson lied to me, I respected why he did.Just as my parents did, he was protecting me. Sure I wanted to be the judge ofthat but as my husband, I knew why he did it and it meant nothing other than toprotect me.
That’s what I remembered when I thought of naked womenaround Jameson. He was my husband. Anyone who knew us knew he only had eyes forme.
Leaving probably wasn’t the best answer given thecircumstance. Jameson was over-systematical in everything he did. When I sawthe results from the Richmond race where he blew a motor after 40 laps, Irealized he’d over-systemized himself into blowing his engine. He did this whenhe pushed himself too hard.
After a week in Washington, we flew home to face reality.
When I arrived back in Mooresville I stopped by the shopto make sure Katie, the payroll manager for JAR Racing, had gotten all thechecks out to the boys on time. We paid the drivers, Justin, Tyler, and Cody onthe first and sixteenth of each month and last month she’d forgotten.
That never went over good so I decided to make sure shehadn’t forgotten this month.
She wasn’t there but I found the paperwork that saidshe’d taken care of it and even managed to get the rest of the staff on JARRacing’s payroll paid too.
As I was leaving, Nadia Henley caught me. She was drivingfor Leddy Motorsports whose shop just so happened to be across the street fromus.
I wasn’t blind to the women around my husband. Obviously.When Nadia started in the cup series, I thought of her as just another driver.
Jameson constantly had women drooling over him and lastweek was a perfect example of the extents they would go to achieve hisattention. Any professional athlete, rock star or actor has women constantlythriving for them to act on temptation. Why?
Because these were the people who lived a lifestyle mostonly dreamed of having.
I saw the attention Nadia invested into Jameson and histhoughts. She’d start off by asking for his advice at the track to which he waswilling to give. Then casually, she’d touch him. It could be as simple asbrushing her arm against his but still, she was going out of her way to touchhim. Something I didn’t appreciate it.
When I asked Jameson about her, I didn’t intend to accusehim of any wrong doing. I knew he’d never cheat on me. But in the heat of themoment, I asked anyway.
Now that I thought about it, it wasn’t Jameson that Ineeded to talk to. If I had these feelings, I needed to go to the source andthat was Nadia.
“Hey Sway, have you seen Jameson?” was how Nadia greetedme that afternoon.
I wanted to say, “Well no, we haven’t seen each other inalmost three weeks because I caught a naked woman in his hotel room.”
I didn’t say that.
Instead, I settled on. “Yes, he’s at home right now.”
“Oh, Justin said he was flying back with Jimi today.”
Well fuck.
