Page 214 of Trading Paint
I was fumbling and shaky, another part of me that was unfamiliar. But just as hesitant as I was, she was acting the same. She was scared.
Resting on my elbows, I looked down at her. “SwayI...”
I wanted to tell her so badly that I loved her. Beg her not to break my heart and convince her that I wouldn’t knowingly break hers in the process.
She simply nodded as if she heard me, breathing, “I know,” Against my cheek. “I want you.”
If I wasn’t listening close enough, you wouldn’t have heard it, but I did.
“I want you too.” I whispered back looking into her eyes.
There was no going back and I don’t think either one of us was reasoned enough to understand that right now. All we knew was what we were feeling.
Soon, I let go of everything I’d been feeling, everything I’dbeen fearingand want bubbled to the surface overpowering and consuming. Feeling her small body underneath me was almost too much to handle. I’d never felt sensations this unbelievably intense before and I still hadn’t entered her.
I had to seek her permission though because this was different from all those one-night stands. I knew they wanted it. With Sway, though her body was telling me she wanted it, I had to know. I couldn’t do this without confirmation she wanted it just as much.
“Are you okay...I mean...are you sure, Sway? We’ve never...”
I couldn’t believe how badly I was shaking, it was sad.
Stop shaking asshole, you’re not a virgin!I told myself.
He didn’t listen,nope,he was far too engrossed in this woman before him offering herself up to him in the most intimate way. Now look at me, I’m shaking like a fool and speaking in the third person.
Pull yourself together!I told him sternly.
“Are yousure? We’ve never discussed...friends with benefits before.” My voice was so weak it didn’t even sound like me.
Sway smiled shyly, nodding.
“Sway?”
Pleasehoney,see what I feel for you. Look into my eyes and I’ll show you.
“Yes?” she wouldn’t look at me, but the nervousness was there.
I wanted to say,“You’re nervous? Hah!How do you think I feel!”but I didn’t.
Instead, I settled on something more simple and vague.
“Are you sure, honey?” my voice was rough. I tried to clear my throat quietly. I don’t know why I kept asking but I had to be sure.
“Yes.” She croaked softly, her eyes searched mine.
That’s all the encouragement I needed, I was naked lying in between her legs, believe me when I say I didn’t need much encouragement any more. I was one sigh away from crumbling and telling her how I felt.
Obsequiously crazed by her beauty for years, who knew the night I won the biggest race of my career would be the night I ended up in bed with my best friend.
You’d think at some point, the confident, more stable me would have taken over, but no, I was still fumbling when I reached for the condom, dropped it and then had to search for it on the floor.
Talk about frustrating.
Gathering my wits, I got the condom on and settled between her legs once more.
My hand, yeah the shaking one, reached between us to guide myself into her. My lips were at her ear, my breathing harsh and staggered. That harsh staggering breathing halted altogether when I pushed forward.
Hollyfuck!
