Page 209 of Trading Paint
Inhaling a deep breath, I ran a towel across my face before placing a hat on. My head fell back against the seat, closing my eyes briefly—I took a deep breath.
“You fucking earned this one!” Kyle stuck his head inside, handing me a beer. “I’ve never met another driver with the skill you have to handle that beast. Great job bud,”
Looking at the fans gathered my eyes focused on Sway’s.
I winked and then hoisted myself from the car. My heart was racing as I took it all in. Everyone was screaming my name, champagne was bursting,Pepsiand beer was sprayed. If you have never had the opportunity to havePepsisprayed in your eyes, you’re not missing anything. That shit burns.
Provoking the crowd, I beat on the roof of the car before launching myself at my team.
Spencer caught me in his steel embrace. “Way to turn it around for us Bro!” he pulled back to look at me reverentially. “I can’t even tell you how proud I am of you.”
Oh, fuck.Thank god for the fucking Pepsi already in my eyes. At least now, I could blame it on the soda. “Thanks dude,” I said humbly.
The broadcasters were right there pulling at me for interviews but I needed someone.
I motioned with my hand for her to come over but she didn’t so I yelled, “Get over here, Sway!”
Her eyes lit up in a way I’d never seen before, wrapping her arms around my waist.
“I’m so proud of you.” She whispered searching my eyes.
For a moment, it seemed as though she could feel everything I was feeling in that moment. My feelings and thoughts were revealed, naked and unprotected for her to judge. Once again, she had power over me. But the girl, the one I grew to love, filled the cracks like bear grease smoothing the imperfections.
No matter how many times I heard the words “I’m proud of you” tonight, with each person it was worth something different. I can’t explainwhybut each one of them, Spencer, Tate, Kyle, they wereallproud of me. With Spencer, it meant that he didn’t mind that he was forced to give up being with his family every weekend to help his little brother race. Tate, well he gave me a chance at this dream, for him to be proud of me, well that meant he wasn’t disappointed at the decision to help.
Now Kyle, the trust between a crew chief and driver is essential. For him to be proud of me, meant I wasn’t just another asshole driver he had to put up with, we respected each other.
When Sway said it, the world stopped, everything stood still. The significance that held was beyond words.
So I settled on, “Thank you for being here. It means everything to me.” Without reserve, I placed my lips to hers. Now wasn’t the time,later.
Later, I would show her exactly what she meant to me.
“Jameson Riley, you heard go from Kyle and you did. Tell us what you did there at the end to catch Darrin.”
“You know, we had an unbelievable car throughout the entire race. The car wasn’t as good on the long runs so we lucked out with the green white checker. We had some problems with pit stops but we had a fast car to make up for it...It’spretty awesome to win here on Memorial Day weekend. All my family is here...even my Nana was able to make it.” I paused trying to remember to thank my sponsors. “I need to thank my sponsor Simplex...all the people that support us, my dad for giving me a chance.”
“Let’s get him over here.” Dad made his way through the crowd toward us.
“Jimi, what do you think of your son here?” He shoved the microphone in his face.
“I knew he had it in him.” Dad smiled. I don’t think I’d seen him smile that wide since Lane was born. “We’re very proud of him.” he reached for me.
Pulling him into a tight embrace, he whispered in my ear, “I mean that, I do.” He choked. “Nothingin the world can come close to seeing you live this dream of yours.”
Your whole life, you look to your parents for approval. Even when you’re young, so much as taking our first steps, we’re seeking approval. Having and wanting are complete opposites and to me, having is prominence without knowing.
The next hour was spent doing interviews, the hat dance, and kissing Sway a few more times.
This didn’t go unnoticed by Lane either when he told me, sternly I might add. “Mama told you no.”
“She’s not my mother though.” I told him standing next to the car. He was perched on the roof, grinning like a crazed three-year who had just hadPepsi.
“You still listen,” he shrugged.
“No, I don’t.”
He sighed and looked down at my car we were standing next to before rolling his eyes. “Ne’nasays you listen to girls.”
