Page 92 of Unbound
His eyes, rugged and somber, offer me a reminder of what’s at stake this time for us. If we’re together tonight, we know there’s no going back again. What we do now hold meaning.
He hesitates before doing so, but he draws me closer, his mouth at my neck and I can feel his ragged breath on me, wetting my neck. His heart beating crazily against my palm and I know I’m not the only one nervous. It reminds me of the night I snuck into his room the evening before the wedding. Watching him tonight, the way he’s expressing himself to me, I know what I want and it’s him. Right now.
“I know,” I say and drop to my knees in front of him, working on his belt buckle. He smells like a bar, cigarettes and beer, but I don’t mind. It reminds me of him in every way.
His stomach pulls in, a sharp intake of breath as if he’s disgusted. “Get up.”
Disappointment hits me right in the chest. “Why?”
He brings me against his chest, twisting us so he can move to the bed. “Because you’re too good for that.”
“Why?” And then I realize why he doesn’t want me on my knees before him. “You don’t want that because that’s what all the other girls did to you, isn’t it?”
His brow pulls together and he’s hurt by what he’s about to say. I sit down on the bed and he stares down at me. “Mostly.”
I hate mostly. I hate the idea, the knowledge he slept with anyone but me. There’s something so pure about two people only ever experiencing each other, and I took that for granted.
“Sophie,” he breathes, fingers under my chin until I meet his eyes. “It’s okay. Please don’t be mad. We don’t have to… if it’s….” His voice trails off. “I just didn’t want you to think I expected anything.”
I take a deep breath, place my finger on his lips, and then tug on his hands to bring him onto the bed with me. “Stop. I want this. More importantly, I wantyou.”
He pulls back, searching my face for a hint of falsity. I wrap my hands around his neck but he’s waiting, for what, I’m not sure.
“Unless you don’t want to.” I’m embarrassed and insecure, warmth surfacing in my cheeks.
He laughs into the skin of my shoulder, low and breathy. “Believe me, Iwantto.”
Our clothes are discarded quickly, neither of us hesitating as he lays me down on the bed.
His exhale is rough and shaky when he settles between my thighs, no barriers between us, but not pushing in yet. Heat pricks my skin when he slides his tongue into my mouth. Shifting his hips, he grinds into me but still doesn’t slide in.
“Condom?”
I shake my head. “I’m on birth control now.”
He raises an eyebrow, staring down at me.
I laugh, the action shaking the both of us. “I swear.”
He cracks a soft smile. “Okay.”
Pushing forward, his eyes droop closed and then he’s inside of me. There’s a moment of silence passing between us. When he starts moving, it’s slow, passionate, and everything I’ve ever known him to be before I broke his heart.
“Fuck,” he breathes out into my mouth. He kisses me, hard and strong, telling me everything he can’t put in words.
I’m sure of it. Nothing compares to the feeling of Rawley entering me right then, pushing his love inside me. Maybe the first time, because that’s what this resembles to me.
“I love you,” he pants, eyes on mine. “You’re beautiful like this, flushed and breathless for me.”
Pushing inside me again, he moves, fighting against the urge to move faster.
A lustful burn runs through and my eyes squeeze shut as I moan his name against his shoulder.
“Open your eyes,” he commands, low and deep. “I want you to see this, me making love to you.”
He wants me to see this because it’s never happened before. Or maybe just that it hasn’t happened in a very long time.
My nails dig into his sides, my kisses beginning at his temples, moving to his chin as his hand cradles the back of my head. Arching my back, I bring him deeper inside me, my legs wrapping around his waist. He smiles, one hand moving to my ass, knowing what I’m doing. His head dips forward just a touch, but his eyes remain on mine.
