Page 27 of Unbound
My cousin, Jude, with his arm around Sophie and he’s holding a baby in his arms.
At first, I don’t think much of it because what do I care if my cousin has a baby now. What I do care about is the fact that it’s my girl his arm is wrapped around.
Jude notices me first, his gaze pinned on me, torn between what, I don’t know.
Clenching my fists, I turn. I’m avoiding the moment. My mother is suddenly beside me, making me look at her. “Do not do anything you’re going to regret.”
I can’t see straight. It’s like everything around me grows fuzzy and unfamiliar. My muscles freeze like they’ve turned to blocks of ice. “What is this? Is she with him?”
Apprehensive eyes search mine. “You need to talk to Sophie. Alone. This is between you two, but now is not the time to have this conversation. We’re having a nice get together tonight and you will not ruin this for Red and Lenny.”
I can’t help myself. My eyes betray me and move toher. It’s then, finally after a year, they lock together, wide and unmistakably caught off guard. She’s staring at me.
My cousin turns too and whispers inmy girl’sear, handing the baby to her.
He has the fucking nerve to walk toward me. My whole body tenses, shakes with anticipation. He doesn’t have the balls to say anything.
He approaches, stance confident as his shoulder knocks mine but still, my eyes remain on her.
I take a covert glance at him, then back to Sophie. “Good to see you, man.”
I say nothing. I don’t move. I want to fucking murder him at the idea he touched her, that any man besides me has ever touched her. My stomach burns with jealousy.
Mom rubs my arm, fingers gripping my forearm. “Pleasedon’t, Rawley. I’m begging you.”
Sophie approaches, tentative steps. I can’t breathe. Each step she takes, it gets harder and harder. I wonder if she’s hurting. I wonder if her throat is tight like mine and choking on words she’s dying to say.
The baby in her arms, brown eyes curiously looking around, fusses, his lips turned down and when he sees my mother, he practically lunges for her.
“Hey.” Mom reaches for the baby while my pulse drones in my ears, slow and steady as if I’m under water and that’s the only sound. “Let me take him inside. Maybe it’s the noise out here.”
And then I’m alone with Sophie, nothing else around me in view, but her. She looks the same, but different, a little older, the years of stress I caused catching up with her.
“Hey,” she says, tucking blonde curls behind her ear, panic set in her eyes. She wasn’t expecting me.
She makes me feel alone.
She makes me feel lost.
I have to clear my throat, but I don’t say anything. The words won’t come out. They just won’t. My body turns toward her, wanting to submit. But looking at her is too hard. It’s all there, etched in every line in her face of how our entire relationship went. It’s the guilt in her eyes.
For years I ignored the guilt I saw because I was too fucked up to care. I wanted her to feel pain like I did so I caused her pain. It wasn’t right, but it’s what I did to her, to us, to everyone.
“Looks like you’ve been busy since I’ve been gone,” I say, smirking, because it’s easier to make her feel bad than to admit my heart is breaking into a million pieces at the idea she hooked up with my cousin. “How’s Jude?”
My mind screams,How could you do that?
But then again, how could I have done any of the fucked-up shit I’ve done in the last few years? Waves of jealousy and despair hit me, and I stare at the ground. My cousin. My fucking cousin? I can’t accept it and nearly shake my head, hands itching to pull her in, keep her, always.
She hates it, remembers the smirk. “Yeah, well, a lots changed since you left,” she replies, brows pulling together again and swallows heavily.
“You seem happy.” I hate the way my voice betrays me and wavers.
“I am.”
“I’m incredibly happy for you then.”
Her blue eyes blaze. She knows I’m baiting her. “Don’t do that.”
