“Yeah, he’s pretty good for that,” she admits, letting go of the spoon so that her hand can come to my leg, patting my thigh before resting there.
My free hand goes to hers, covering it. “I’m glad I’ve got you too. I’m the only one out of my old friend group who stayed in Corpus Christi instead of heading to Austin or College Station or Denver or Los Angeles. And I love my boys, they’re all great. But having friends outside of soccer, I think, is pretty healthy for me. I need people outside of that circle too. Keeps me sane.”
“I’d imagine.”
I turn my head, leaning some and then a bit more until she gets the hint and starts sharing that mangonada, giving me a spoonful of frozen mango covered in chamoy and tajín before sitting back up. “So, how do you two know each other anyway?”
“He’s from San Antonio too.” Which, now, is an obvious connection I should’ve made easily. “We went to the same high school. Our parents went to the same high school too. They basically reconnected when we were freshmen and then we became friends because our moms and dads were always hanging out. Soon enough, we were besties. He was in my quince court and everything. Honestly, he’s the one who put the idea of coming here for school in my head. I was fine staying in San Antonio. Had a couple options that I probably would’ve been just fine with.”
“And then?”
She takes a deep breath, slowly letting it out, looking from me to the bay. “And then we had a heart-to-heart. Both of us went through some pretty bad breakups around graduation. He thought we could use a change of scenery for a while. Not have reminders or, worse, those guys close by while we’re trying to live in the moment and be free and all that. He wanted to take a chance on somewhere new, and I wanted to come with him. I think we both knew that this could be the best thing for our own happiness.”
“Was he right? Is the best and freest version of you here in Corpus Christi, Texas?”
“I know he thinks so.”
“I wasn’t asking about him. I want to know what you think.”
Leana’s head falls on my shoulder for a minute while we both just watch and listen to the water and the seagulls flying around. And then she sits back up, her head turned to face me. Her hand comes up to the back of my head, pulling me down gently for a kiss. It’s slow. Thoughtful, even. Like maybe this is just as much an answer as whatever words she could give me.
“I’m really happy you came up to me,” she says. “That it was you who asked to carry a box for me.”
Memories of the last few weeks come to mind. The handful of days that have started with running with Leana, her being the first person I talk to in the morning. Thesuper over itlook she gave me when, after finding out she’s studying to be a nurse, I told her that, if it’d help her with classes, we could do a “nurse and the futbolista coming in for his physical” roleplay sometime. When she said that, if she had to pick a favorite Mexican food, it’d be a torta whensopes are right there. Like, that’s the only correct answer. And how I told her that, with her being so wrong, I might have to reconsider whether I need a running partner. How she pulled me close and kissed me and made me forget how wrong she was. All those times I’ve gotten to just hold her for a few minutes before leaving her room and having to hustle for the rest of my day.
“I am too.”
“I … I don’t regret coming here. I think that he was right. I needed somewhere new. Somewhere different. And the last two and a half weeks have been great for a lot of reasons. But I—I don’t know.”
“What don’t you know?”
“I— A part of me isn’t so sure I’m living up to the opportunity the way I should be. I think that maybe I’m still not letting myself be free enough to say whether or not Vale was right. And that happiness, actual happiness, might be more complicated than a yes or no answer.”
“Not to be insulting here, but you’re sounding like a philosopher now.”
“Comes with having Vale as a bestie. But, for real. I can admit that I did need to get away and be able to do things for me and not have my family around judging me or trying to give me their say-so about everything I do. But I’m also figuring out what me being free looks like. What me taking advantage of this giftlooks like. And I—I think that means I need to make some really big decisions soon.”
“Well, I’ll be here for you. And I am here for you.”
“I know,” she says, her fingers gently scratching the back of my neck. “And out of everything I might regret, being here, with you, I don’t think could ever be one of them.”
She kisses me one more time and then brings her hand down, slapping the skin of my thigh. “We should get going. I told your roommates I’d have you back early enough to go to the gym with them, and I still need to give you your loser reward.”
“Pues, after you then, mamita.”
12
“I’LL BE OVER ATPérez and Nguyen’s room next door,” Ahmed says, peeking into the hotel bathroom while I’m shaving the little bit of stubble I ever get. Picking my head up, I catch his reflection in the parts of the mirror that aren’t still fogged up. “And you know most people would wrap a towel around their waist? I think they’re meant to fit that way.”
“Most people would also knock before opening a door,” I tell him back. Because I’m not going to be blamed for having my towel draped over my shoulder and him getting a view of my bare ass. I could’ve been facing the other way. “How much time do I have before we’re heading to the pitch?”
“About thirty minutes. No rush. Thought I’d give you some space, though, in case you want to relieve some pre-game stress. Just make sure you keep the volume down on your phone. The walls are pretty thin. Heard Pérez moaning earlier and Nguyen telling him to shut the fuck up. Oh, and don’t use the hand towelon my bed to wipe off. Already claimed that one while you were showering, if you get what I mean.”
“And you just leave it on your bed?”
“Felt more hygienic than the floor. Don’t pretend it’s weird. Less weird than showering when you’re about to get all sweaty and grass stained.”
“One, it helps me wake up. You might’ve slept the whole way here,on metoo, but I couldn’t. And, two, airplanes make me feel dirty,” I groan back. “There’s no way I’d be on my best game if I didn’t scrub that feeling off me. Let me be. I’ll see you in a few.”
