“Had some self-realizations, have you? You didn’t take her side before when Colin was upsetting her.”
Wow. Mick had obviously spoken to Haz about everything that had happened. I was pleased she had support but why couldn’t she have gone to Belle or Sean? Maybe it was good she wasn’t opening her heart to Sean. He wanted to kill me already. Since the very hostile phone call, the only contact I’d had with Sean was one text. He’d sent me two photos. No words. Just images of Robert DeNiro doing the “I’m watching you,” hand gestures.
Fucking Rose. Why had I ever thought she was nice? She was all kinds of creepy. I sometimes saw her on my drive-bys, sometimes in the yard, sometimes as a silhouette in her living room. I didn’t like that she was watching Haz, but I was worried that confronting her might make her think that we wererenewing contact. As annoyed as I was that Mick was playing savior tomy wife, I was glad Rose knew we had eyes on her.
Divorce lawyers? This chick was knee deep in delusion. Why couldn’t I have fucked up with a normal woman? Better yet, why did I fuck up at all? The selfish, nasty part of me was hoping Colin would decline so much he’d have to enter a nursing home. That wouldn’t guarantee that Rose would leave though; she’d probably stay in his house. That might be an even worse prospect: Rose with more time on her hands. We shouldn’t have to move, but I wouldn’t have Haz living in anxiety because I’d been a world-class dick. And Haz had gone to such efforts to get the house ready for the baby. No, we couldn’t move. I felt useless living at Mick’s. It would all be okay. In one week, I’d move home and protect Haz from the world.
Chapter 13. Harriet – A rose by any other name
I was now 37 weeks. Blake had been living in the guest room for the past week, and it wasn’t as painful as I thought it would be. He’d been useful, taking over most of the household chores, even though I was now on maternity leave. We hadn’t heard from Rose since she’d “anonymously” left the business card in my letterbox. That had unsettled me. Sean wanted me to move in with him, claiming that Rose was so obviously delusional that she was a danger. He was still furious with Blake, claiming that Rose would never have been an issue had Blake not been such a blind fool. He was 100% right on that one.
Blake and I didn’t discuss the whole Rose thing. The first day he was living here, he tried to clarify that I knew everything and there was nothing more to learn, but I didn’t want to hear it. I meant it when I told him I was totally focused on the baby. This whole Rose saga could wait. This time was for me and my baby. I shut him down and thankfully he shut his mouth.
We weren’t exactly living in silence, but when we did speak, it was about the baby or the house. I was so excited! I was stocking the change table when my phone lit up.
Rose F: Hey Haz, I can’t get onto Bear. Dad is refusing to eat and I don’t know what to do.
The nerve of this bitch. Sean had me convinced that she was cray cray, so I played nice. Well, as nice as I could.
Me: I’m not a nurse. I don’t know either. Take him to the doctor. Jacqui’s home if you need help.
Rose F: Can you please let Bear know?
Me: No.
I called out to Blake and filled him in on the Rose drama. He ran his hand through his hair. “Fucking hell. I knew this would happen if I blocked her. I’m so sorry Haz.”
“Unblock her if you’re so concerned. You’ve probably missed your nipple quota this month anyway,” I spat cattily. This was the problem. Rose would always come up. I could picture myself in a rocking chair in my 80s, enjoying an open fire with Blake and asking him to make a cup of tea.
“Sure, Haz. Just give me a sec,” he’d say.
“Why? Do you have a text from Rose?” I’d snipe back.
It never goes away. I know me; I know me very well. I am forgiving but I struggle to forget. My experiences with Dad taught me very young to cut off toxicity for your own mental health. I’d be a senior citizen and still hate Blake for what he’d done.
“I’m not going to unblock her. Even if Colin is dead, there’s nothing I can do,” he replied patiently. “I’m just worried she’s upsetting and you and sorry that I’m the cause.”
“She upsets me by existing, Blake. And so do you.”
He stayed in the room for a minute, looking around at the soft green walls I’d chosen.
“Looks great in here, Haz. You’ve done a brilliant job.”
“Thanks.”
Time ticked on. He’d been gone from the room for about five seconds when I heard a knock at the door. I waddled out to the living room to see Blake’s back at the door and Rose in the entryway.
“Oh Bear, I’m so worried. Dad won’t eat,” she gasped out, placing a hand dramatically over her forehead.
“Not my problem, Rose. Call 911.” He shut the door, but clearly audacity was in plentiful supply for Rose. We heard her voice through the door.
“Bear, don’t cut me out! I know we have to wait to be together but I need you now!”
Yeah, this bitch was crazy.
I looked at Blake and shrugged. She wasn’t my problem.
He opened the door again.
