He reaches across and places his hand on my tummy, his gaze narrowing. “I love you, too,” he whispers. And I think he’s accepting it all now. Me and him and the baby. “You can’t ever leave me, Marisa.”
“I wouldn’t.” I place my hand over his. “We wouldn’t.” And I smile, thinking “Checkmate” in my head, but something—something doesn’t feel right. It’s like I’m faking that checkmate, because have I truly won? He loves me now, he sees how special I am, how much I love him. The sacrifices I’ve made... but still, something is off about this entire ordeal. My phone buzzes.Ding-a-ling-ling.I look down at a text:Tonight at 8, Central Park? xX Ed. Your lips are addicting, BTW. ;)
My chest tightens. Something like a gang of angry bees swarms in my stomach. I should say no... I glance up at Justin, at my sad, broken Justin and guilt slams over me full force. Sure, he went off and sunk himself balls deep into girls when we were together, but we weren’ttogetherlike we are now.
Maybe this intoxicating rush buzzing through me, this sensation of being wanted desperately by more than one person at time is why Justin did it. But, I’m not that person. I’m not a cheater, and god knows we don’t need two kings on this board, so I turn my ringer off, set my phone down, and lie back on the couch.
“Lay with me,” I say to Justin. His face softens and he comes to me, laying his head right over my heart. I hope he hears the way it beats for him, how it quickens at his touch. “It’s all going to be okay,” I whisper, stroking my fingers through his hair. “Everyone makes mistakes.”
“I just wish I could remember why I did it.”
“It wouldn’t change anything, and besides, everything happens for a reason. There was a reason she had to die... ” I take a breath because maybe that sounded too certain... “I’m sure there was.”Fifth element...“Honestly, I think you get too into your characters. That book you are working on,” I shake my head, “it’s messed up, babe. I mean, haven’t you readThe Shining?”
“Yeah... ”
“You’re Jack Torrence,” I laugh.
But all he does is glare at me. “It was the hotel that possessed him, not his writing.”
I roll my eyes. “What I’m saying is, stuff gets to you.”
“I just, want it to go away.” He huffs and places his hand back on my stomach. We lie in silence for a few minutes, and I watch him. I can see his mind whirring, his thoughts chasing him to the brink of insanity. I know. I’ve been chased there and it’s not a pretty place at all.
“I hope it’s a boy,” he says. “If it’s a boy can we named him Gage? Gage Creed Wild?”
My heart flutters and my chest swells with pride. “We can name him whatever you want, babe,” I say. “Whatever you want.”Even though your last name’s not really Wild...
