There’s theglug glug glugof Earl tilting that bottle back again, and for some reason, I just want to yank it out of his weathered hands, smash him in the fucking skull with it, and watch him bleed. But I don’t.
“Yep,” he says, hitching his pants back under his gut. “People are fucked up.”
And I sit here in silence, drinking, trying to rationalize the fact that I’m just as fucked up as Earl.
12
Max
Day 16
The alarm clockon the bedside table goes off. I groan. I curse. I toss and turn, pulling the comforter over my face. And finally, when the damn thing gets so loud I can actually see my pulse in my closed eyelids, I get up. I turn the alarm off. I take a shower, brush my teeth, get dressed. Today is an important day. Today I show her I amkind. I show her Icare. In a world where everything is bad, I will make her see me as good. As a god. And as her only fucking hope.
The house is quiet. No one is up yet, except the dogs who are following me around like a shadow. I grab items from the pantry and cabinets, and when I start to cook, both dogs sit on the floor beside the stove, staring at me and wagging their mangy tails. Thirty minutes later, two plates are full of scrambled eggs, biscuits, and bacon. I turn around and a piece of bacon drops to the floor. Rufus snatches it up and Bear nearly knocks me over chasing him through the kitchen to steal it.
“Watch it,” I warn as I open the door to the cellar.
When I reach the door with both plates, I stare at the lock.Well, fucking hell. I didn’t think that through, did I now?I balance one plate on my forearm, nearly dropping it as I unlatch the locks. She’s still asleep when the door swings into the room. I attempt to shut it quietly, but when the lock turns, she jumps up in the bed, dazed. For a moment, the confusion is evident on her face. Her gaze bounces from my face to the plates to the door and around the room. She’s disoriented. And the moment she remembers where she actually is, well, it’s obvious because her entire body sinks.
“Breakfast,” I say as I take a seat on the end of the mattress. I hand the plate to her and she eyes the food. “It’s not poisoned,” I say.
“I don’t care if it is. I have no control here. I know that. If you want me dead, let’s be honest, not much I can do about that.” She grabs the plate and sets it in her lap. I take a forkful of egg and cram it inside my mouth. “Why are you eating with me?” she asks.
I shrug. “Why not?”
She studies me, and it seems she’s attempting to peer into places no one should try to go. We hold a silent and scrutinizing staring contest while we eat. Once she’s finished she sets the plate on the ground and sighs. I place my plate on top of hers and scoot back on the mattress, leaning against the wall. There’s a pipe that’s leaking and the constant drip of water is annoying as fuck.
Her eyes follow my gaze to the pipe. “Annoying, huh?” she asks.
“Yep.”
“Bother you, I guess?”
“Yeah, of course it does.”
“I’ll tape it up then.”
There’s a few minutes of silence again and then she sighs. “Can you at least let me know before you do it? Or before someone’s going to do it? I just want to know, in case I want to pray or something, you know?”
I look at her from the corner of my eye. “I’mnotgoing to kill you.”
“You don’t have to lie to me. It’s not like you’re just going to let me go, even if you get what you want…whateverthat is,” she grumbles.
Closing my eyes, I place my hands behind my head and get more comfortable in my spot on the mattress. “I don’t want to kill you.”
“But you’re going to.” Her voice has a slight tremor to it now.
“No.”
“Do you know why my brother wanted me dead?”
“No.” I swallow. Fucking Earl must have told her, and I am not willing to go any further with that, so I change the topic. “What size do you wear?”
“What?”
“Clothes. What size clothes? I’m gonna go get some clothes for you.”
She sits silently for a moment. “A six. Medium. Stuff like that. Not that it matters if it fits, you know.”
