“Rebecca?”
“Rebeccathe book!”
“I know—I’m saying, are you Rebecca?”
“No!” Coralie almost screamed through tears. “That’s the whole point; Marina is Rebecca! I’m the narrator who doesn’t have a name!”
It appeared she had breached the anger/sadness barrier. She’d become sad enough for Adam to care about her more than he hated conflict. He walked toward her with his arms out. She fell into them. He murmured into her hair. “What are you saying? You’re envious of Marina?” Coralie nodded. “I know, it’s because she’s married to Tory Tom.”
“When Marina was my age, she already had Zora.”
“She was too young when she had Zora, that’s all she kept telling me! And I still felt too young, even at thirty-three, and I probably did a terrible job. Any other child, anyone not as perfect as Zora—we would thoroughly have messed them up with what we did.”
“You didn’t even slightly mess up; you did amazingly with your divorce, the most mature divorce in England.”
“It was still shit.”
“Okay! But I’m the sad one, by the way! I’m the one getting questioned about mystatus. I’m the one having Christmas away from my family.”
“I’m glad I’m having Christmas away from my family,” Adam said. “I’ve never been as glad to say goodbye.”
“Well, me too, to be honest, about my family. And yours. But you’re not even having Christmas with me! You walked out on me atThe Snowman! You’re down there clanging the forks in the dishwasher!”
“You hate that,” Adam said, like he’d finally solved a mystery. “The clanging.”
“And you made fun of the house plans in front of Anne!”
“You know I shut down when Anne’s here!”
“It took me ages to make those house plans. Antoinette’s husband even helped—he’s doing the new flagship store for Yohji Yamamoto! I’ve had the engineer in about the beam, about the rooflights—they have to be produced to order! It’s all signed off by the council, Miss Mavis said yes about the party wall, the builders could start inJanuary!”
“Hey…” He put his arms around her again.
“No one gets their plans approved that quickly. It was a full-time job in addition to my actual full-time job! I thought you were excited too!” Suddenly she was crying again. “All the money I’ve saved since I was nineteen has gone into that renovation! All of it!”
“Iam, I am excited about the house plans. And about our life plans!”
“What life plans! That’s the whole point! I don’t see any life plans at all!”
“Hey…” He leaned back and studied her. “Where did all this come from?”
“We discussedallof this! I thought you wanted it too!”
“Are we still talking about the renovation?”
He was going to make her say the wordbaby. She couldn’t, she couldn’t be a woman crying about that. “We’ve talked aboutallof it, about everything,” she said. “Moving in, and then…” She trailed off. “You added writing a book in the plans, which is fine.”
“You added doing the house up—also fine.”
“But now I’m thirty-one and a half!”
“And a quarter! I let you get away with half to Mum. But not to me! Hey…” Adam reached for her. “We both want a baby, not just you. It’s our future.Ourfuture, that we both want.”
He had said it. He’d said the wordbaby. She was back on solid ground. “Time’s already passed,” Coralie said. “The future’s suddenly now.”
“I didn’t realize it was now.” She had seen him make an effort of comprehension. Now he made an effort of adjustment. “Okay,” he stoutly said. “We’ll clear the decks and get on with it. Book, get it done. House, get it done. Wedding?”
“No wedding!” Spending a year on event planning was the last thing Coralie needed. Anyway, after the renovation, they wouldn’t have the money.
