I love it.
He types something, then erases it, then types something again, but then the three dots disappear. I start the song over and lay it on top of my belly so our daughter can hear it.
And I pray like hell this isn’t the goodbye I think it is.
After a few hiccups, Dally is married, and currently tonguing her husband down during their first dance. It’s borderline pornography, but the way Peanuthead’s gun is tucked in the back of his pants, we all know not to say anything.
Thankfully, they picked We Both Deserve Each Other’s Love, and it’s three minutes, so the dance floor fills as they keep twirling and making out.
Uncle Junior twirls me through the floor like I’m a kid, making me laugh. When he’s done, his eyes are shining with tears.
He’s the hardest nigga I know, harder than Uncle Tre, but when it comes to his girls, he’s soft as cotton. Me and YT are the apples of his eye.
“I hope one day soon I’m walking you down the aisle and having a father-daughter dance with you.”
I snort and roll my eyes. “You have better luck wishing for YT to settle down.”
“Excuse me, may I cut in?”
We both turn to see Shaddy, who hasn’t said much to me, standing there. Uncle Junior cuts his eyes to me and smirks before hardening his glare at Shaddy.
“Take care of her, lil nigga.”
Shad nods, and Uncle Junior places my hand in his before walking off. He pulls me in close, eyes never leaving mine as everything else, the music, our friends and family, it falls away. Leaving only us.
“I have something… something I need to tell you.” He licks his lips, but for once I can’t ogle him. Now when a shiver passes at the finality and seriousness of his voice.
“This is probably the wrong time and place to say this, but shit, it don’t be seeming like shit be working out in our favor anyway.”
I clear my throat. “I’m all ears, Shaddy.”
He blinks twice, before tightening his hold on my waist.
“I never was one to believe in ‘right person, wrong time.’ Shit, I barely believed in meeting the right person. I… there’s… fuck. I been drowning, Mace. For a long time. Since I was born, it feels like. And then you come along, and you and Beanie become my lifeline. But I’m already sinking, and I just can’t… I can’t pull you down with me.”
I wonder if he hears my heart fracturing as his lids line with tears.
“You wouldn’t–”
“I would, Mace. I be wanting… I be wanting to tell you everything. About my family. About how I feel. About how some days, the only thing that gets me up is you. But that’s a burden I never want you to have, especially with you having a baby–”
“Ourbaby, Rahshad. I can be your lifeline… I can do it!” I stress.
He pulls me even closer, his warm breath at my ear. “I can’t ask you to be that for me.”
I sniff, praying these damn tears don’t fall over, but when I lean back and see one traveling down his cheek, I know I’m a goner.
“I hate that I found you in this life, Mace. I hate that I can’t be the man you need.”
I wrap my hands around his neck to bring him closer to me. “You can, Shaddy. You are–”
“I’m not, baby. But I promise you, I’ll find you in the next one. And then I’ll never let you go.”
He pries my hands off his neck and kisses the backs of them, before leading me off the dancefloor. As soon as YC comes up to me, Shaddy skidaddles, narrowly missing his hand reaching out for his neck.
YC’s menacing black eyes dance around my face. “YP left some C4 in my trunk. Do I need to get it?”
I cough out a laugh and shake my head. “No, fool, weddings just make me emotional, and I’m pregnant… just… dance with me. Please.”
