Page 46 of Recipes for Life
He must have walked over a mile with me in his arms, away from the flashing lights, away from the wreckage that I couldn’t help but stare at in the distance.All those people, all those lives... All those people who won’t be making it home to their families.
I could have been one of them. I could have never held Lux again, I could have missed my baby girl growing up, I could have missed this.
My entire body shook with those thoughts. Now that I wasn’t focused on what lay in front of me, my mind was turning back on, and I was only a few seconds away from a total breakdown.
Murphy must have felt my rising anxiety because he picked up his pace and luckily, we made it to his car in just a few minutes, but I was unable to get my body to stop shaking. I knew I was going into some form of shock.
I barely registered when Murphy sat me in the back seat and climbed in after me.
“Odette? I think you’re having a panic attack,” he whispered in my ear.
A panic attack, a panic attack.
My body was still vibrating and my teeth were clamped together, and I was unable to form words.
I could have been one of them. I could have never held Lux again, I could have missed my baby girl growing up, I could have missed everything.
The thoughts were going round and round in my head, and I couldn’t seem to break through the absolute horror I felt.
“Odette, baby, look at me please.”
I heard Murphy's plea, but I was unable to do much of anything but think all those horrible thoughts.
I could have missed this. I could have missed everything.
I found myself reaching out, and my hands clutched Murphy’s shirt so hard, I thought they would have to pry the shirt from him instead of getting me to release my hands. I was able to bring my eyes to meet his, and seeing his devastation matched my own was like a lifeline when I felt like I was sinking into the terror ofwhat if’s.
He came for me.
“You came for me.” I couldn’t stop my flowing tears, and I don’t think I would have even if I could.
“I willalwayscome for you.”
The sobs overtook me, and Murphy wasted no time pulling me into his chest. Even though the backseat wasn’t the most spacious, he had hunched himself over in what could nothave been a comfortable position so he could hold me while I broke down.
He said nothing, just held me.
He was giving me exactly what I needed.
Him.
Chapter 31
Odette
I realized I had never called in as we pulled into the hospital parking lot. I almost tore in through the front lobby, ready to explain and ready to get to work. Murphy's arm around my waist, helping me inside due to the pain in my ribs, prevented that from happening, while also alerting me to what a terrible idea that would be.
Once I walked in through the ER entrance, the charge nurse, Loretta, took one look at me and gasped, “What happened?”.
“I was part of the pile-up. I’m sorry, I should have called… I—”
“Hush now. Go get yourself checked in, and I’ll get a doctor to order the necessary tests. Where do you think you sustained the most damage?”
“My ribs. I’m unsure if it was the airbag or the seatbelt, but I did my best to ignore the pain and now it feels like knives are stabbing me whenever I take a breath.”
I felt Murphy tense from beside me and move his hand from my side in almost horror when he realized he was grabbing the part I was telling Loretta hurt the most. I almost demanded he put his arm back around me, but I sighed in a bit of relief once he released me.
“Tisk, Odette, you know better. You could have punctured a lung with all that moving.”
