Stop it,I told myself. I felt nervous and on edge. If I didn't get a handle on my emotions, Kyle might be able to feel them and figure out what I was up to.
What if Kyle never forgave me for this? I felt a rising panic at the possible repercussions of my actions. But it didn't matter. My survival wasn't a part of my plan. I hurried to the bathroom to throw some water on my face and pat it dry. My reflection in the mirror stopped me for a moment.
Would he be able to read the betrayal in my eyes?Only if you allow him, I said in answer to my own question.
I entered the bedroom and began to pace again while I began to go through my plan, making sure I covered each step. Processing every thought with meticulous concentration allowed me to keep my anxiety and nervousness from exploding into debilitating panic.
But there was only one likely scenario that was going to take place. And there was very little chance I was going to survive. The only comfort would be that I would save my mate and our pack.
I closed my eyes briefly when I felt the pain of my betrayal. He couldn't stop me if he didn't know. I couldn't let him find out.
The sound of footsteps made me stop and I held my breath. The door opened and Kyle entered. The sight of him made me swallow my emotion. The smile he gave me made my heart leap in response.
"I'm sorry," he said, shutting the door behind him. "I was longer than I expected."
I returned his smile as best as I could without giving away anything.
"I missed you," I told him, trying to cover my nervousness with a smile. He shrugged his jacked off and threw it over a chair before he came to a stop in front of me.
"I missed you too," he said, taking my hands into his. "Being away from you sucks."
Briefly I closed my eyes and allowed the feeling of completeness that only our touch could give me to flow over me. I reveled in it, not allowing the sadness I also felt to ruin it.
Shutting down the thoughts in my mind, I tried to concentrate on him. He looked tired, and I caressed his cheek when his hands rested on my hips.
"You need to rest," I told him, feeling protective over him.
But you're going to betray him. I shoved the thought away. I didn't want to ruin possibly the only time I might have left with the man I loved struggling with the guilt at my actions. My heart swelled with the emotion I felt for him. I cradled his face, allowing myself to take in every inch of his beautiful features.
"I need you," he whispered. Feeling breathless at his words, I reached up and pulled him down to kiss me.
"I'm here," I whispered against his lips before his mouth covered mine.
Shutting down all my thoughts, I concentrated only on the physical feel of his lips beneath mine and the touch of his hands that slid around my waist and pulled me to him.
"A lifetime of this won't be enough," he said softly when he broke our kiss. I felt a pang of guilt because there wouldn't be that for us. His eyes swept over me and I tingled beneath his gaze. I released my hold around his neck and my hands rested on his chest.
"I love you," I whispered. I had even before I had discovered we were mates. Our connection had only intensified and strengthened the true feelings I had felt before for him.
"I love you too, so much sometimes it hurts," he said. His eyes held mine. I liked the way he looked at me like I was the only thing that mattered.
It was hard to block out thoughts of what Dean and Bay were doing. How far had they gotten? Had they been caught yet?
"You okay?" he asked, his forehead creased. He touched my bottom lip with his index finger.
I nodded, trying to let go of the thoughts to ease the stress I was feeling.
"Yes."
We had decided they would let me know as soon as they could whether my plan had worked or not. There was so much riding on this. If we failed, people would die. I wouldn't be able to save anyone. If my plan succeeded, then I could save everyone.
My heart ached when I looked into Kyle's eyes. At times they were a silvery gray but when I looked closer there were flecks of blue, just like the sea. Beautiful.
"Love me," I whispered, needing him to let me feel what we shared one more time before everything fell apart.
He held my face gently between his hands as he leaned closer, touching his lips gently to mine. My stomach fluttered and I gripped his shirt. His lips strained harder against mine and I gasped, allowing his tongue to enter my mouth.
My tongue stroked his gently. His hand released my face and dropped to my waist.
