“Our secret. Just… us.”
We’d both boarded our separate planes to fly to Mykonos and leave our messes behind, but those messes would still be there when we returned. I knew Henry and I knew his heart. He wouldn’t be so cruel as to fly back home, drag me down to Henley-on-Thames, and throw me in front of Lillie. From what he’d told me, and the way Andy had behaved, Lillie’s heart was still too fragile for that. Which would mean more secrets. More lies. More frustrations.
We were both exhausted by them already.
And could I really drag Henry into my life? To my parents, who just needed to realise they were no good for each other? To my crazy schedule, with my silly little jobs that kept me far too busy but afloat until I figured out what I actually wanted to do with my future? To a world where Rob would no doubt be waiting for me, ready to try get his revenge for my silence?
Or was it better for us to just walk away altogether and remember the magic we created together fondly?
There were far too many questions with too few answers, making the familiar threat of tears rise until I forced them backdown. I didn’t have time for any of that. Not when I still had him in my sights.
Henry shoved his phone in his pocket then turned my way, catching my eye, and that chest of mine pinched so tightly, all I could do was smile back at him. That secret, silent language we’d created passed between us once more, and I heard everything he didn’t say as he stared back at me.
Eventually, though, the coach’s heavy engine had us all turning around to see it arriving all too soon, signalling the end of our summer of true colours, where we’d found out who we really were, what we truly wanted, and we’d got it all.
Gluttony always had carried a heavy punishment, and the time had come for me to face mine.
Chapter Thirty-Six
Henry
Phoebe hadn’t taken her eyes off me until I began to wheel my case over to the coach, and then she’d looked away, her chin dipping to her chest as she ran a hand through her hair.
If she thought I’d leave without a real goodbye for everyone to see, she underestimated just how much she meant to me.
I had nothing left to hide now.
Andy hadn’t spoken to me properly for days apart from the odd grunt here and there, and Jace hadn’t hid the awkwardness he felt from being in the middle of everything, but Jace being Jace, he’d handled it the same way he handled everything: with badly timed jokes and a humour not everyone understood.
Now, though, we had a long flight to endure, where we couldn’t ignore each other, and I’d deal with all that once I’d said this shitty goodbye to the woman who’d made my time in Mykonos not just bearable, but the best two weeks of my formerly miserable life.
After throwing my case into the coach’s storage compartment, I came face to face with Andy. He glowered up atme, but I had no time for his shit. Anger rose within me that my supposed best friend couldn’t just be happy that, for the first time in years, I’d found some happiness of my own.
“Look at me like that all you want,” I told him. “When we get home, you and I have some talking to do. Until then, until we land… don’t you dare say a damn word about what I’m about to do next. You got it?”
He glared at me some more with no response, but I didn’t miss the slight swallow he fought to hide before I brushed past him to go find the one person who deserved my time and energy.
Phoebe tried desperately not to look as forlorn as she clearly felt, wearing her loose-fitting trousers and her pretty little camisole, the tan to her skin making her impossibly more beautiful than she’d been the first day I’d laid eyes on her.
Without thought for anyone else, I marched over to her with purpose, my hands finding their way into her loose, thick hair before I fisted the back of it and pulled her into me for a kiss so deep, I feared I’d drown in her.
I kissed her with every ounce of gratitude I had for the memories and every goodbye I never could say. With every part of me that wanted to tell her how I really felt.
She held onto my wrists, stretched up on her toes, and we lost ourselves in each other for the very last time.
But like every trip I’d ever been on…
Every book she’d ever read…
Everything good came to an end eventually.
When I reluctantly pulled back and let my forehead rest against hers, my hands cupping her neck, I whispered, “Another day of you, and I wouldn’t have been able to walk away. I can barely do it now.”
“Henry, I…” She trailed off. “I don’t know what I need to say, only that there’s so much of it, I can’t get any of it in order.”
“Shh. It’s okay. You don’t have to say any of it. I already know.”
I did. This thing between us hadn’t been planned or expected, but it had been perfect all the same, and I wanted more of it—more of her. Goddamn it, I wanted all of her. But she had shit going on back home, and she’d made so many rules I’d already broken for her. I didn’t want to force her to break more she wasn’t ready to break.
