Page 109 of Selfie
The night we met. House of Blues. Nathan was there because he knew Finn? He never mentioned it. “Wait. Elise’s daughter died too?” I ask.
“Claire? No, she wasn’t in the car. They took her from Nate when her mom died. She had to go live with her grandmother.”
Her grandmother? I throw my hand over my mouth as that last piece of my déjà vu puzzle scuttles through my brain and slams into place. Claire looks so familiar because I saw her before. The little girl in the picture in Nathan’s office. The beautiful redheaded woman and her almost-identical daughter. It’s why Nathan’s such a natural with Charlie. He’s done this before.Oh, Nathan.He didn’t just lose his fiancée. He lost his family.
My mind races, more of the story coming together. Ruby mentioned her son traveled a lot for work, which is why she took care of Claire.
“Finn, what happened to Peter?”
“Prison. After everything came out about him abusing Elise, he was sentenced. He just got out though. Nathan was pretty pissed about it.”
Heart thumping against my rib cage, I sift through my memories like a mental scrapbook. I focus on every single time I’ve seen Claire. Were there any marks? Was she wearing heavy makeup to cover anything up? I can’t remember anything concerning. Charlie has zero chill and would’ve told me if her friend was getting hurt. Maybe Peter was only abusive to Elise, but I’m furious at Ruby for lying to me. Charlie’s been over there several times now. As her guardian, I had a right to know if she was around an abusive felon. I have to tell Nathan.
I haveso muchI have to tell him. Which brings me back to the conversation at hand.
“So, no presents?”
“Nope,” Dex answers this time. “That’s not what he wants.”
“Then what should she do?” Lennox wonders out loud.
Finn and Dex exchange glances. “Which version are we doing? Are we giving general advice from guys and pretending like we didn’t hear everything you guys talked about? Or do you want specific advice for your situation?”
Heat splashing my cheeks, I cover my eyes again. “Specific,” I mumble.
“Send him a nude,” Dex says simply. “Ow.What?” he adds after Lennox slaps him on the thigh.
“You Neanderthal. This is a man she’s falling for, not a Tinder date.”
“Not to mention, the last guy she did that for was a pig. It’s not something she takes lightly,” Avery says.
I sit silently as my friends run commentary about my love life as if they were announcers at the Super Bowl.
“Exactly,” Finn chimes in. “It’s a trust thing. If he opened up to you about Elise, he cares for you deeply, Spencer. And you in not so many words told him you don’t trust him. If you give him what you gave Casey and let Nathan treat you better, that’s all he wants.”
“How do you know that?”
“I’m so confident, I’ll punch Finn in the dick if he’s wrong,” Dex promises.
Finn’s face pinches in offense. “The fuck?”
Dex shrugs innocently. “I’m trying to make her feel confident in your advice.”
“Punch your own dick.” He faces me again. “Ignore him. Listen to me. See this woman right here?” He jostles Avery goofily in his embrace. “Do you know why we’re so close and I love her so much? Because we figured our shit out together. You don’t need to be asking us for sex advice. If Nathan is your guy, then navigate thiswithhim.”
I shake my head. “I see what you’re saying, but I really don’t know what I’m doing. And I don’t want to scare him off.” The irony is that in an effort to not scare him off, I chased him away.
“Neither did I,” Avery muses, slowly turning to smile at Finn. “But when you fall in love, it’s not about being perfect. It’s just having faith that even when you don’t see the best in yourself, your person does. That’s all it takes to make this work.”
“It’s that simple?”
“That simple.” Lennox nods. “Believe us. We’ve already had our lessons in love. I’m sure there’s more to come,” she adds as she holds her belly, “but it all starts with being brave enough to trust someone with your insecurities. It’s such a heavy burden to carry on your own. If you want a real, honest relationship with Nathan, then help each other figure it out.”
I nod in agreement, questioning if I’m actually capable of that. I’m good at burying things. I’m skilled at running and rebuilding. But can I trust someone enough to let them see all my ugly scars?
“Now that we’ve settled that, circling back to earlier, you said you had some questions about oral?” Lennox asks, entirely unashamed.
I’ve never seen two people jump to their feet faster in my entire life.
