Angling to look at him through my sunglasses, I couldn’t help the sliver of jealousy that needled at me. He’d had so many incredible seasons playing professional basketball in the League, no significant injuries. While the media were pains in the ass last season when he came out and shared his relationship with Nate with the world, he’d had a killer one.
It was so much more than that, though. Ryan was also in love with a great guy and lived in paradise.
Not to get me wrong. Ryan still hadn’t convinced me every creature I saw wasn’t going to kill me. But still, the man had it all.
Me? I’d run away for the off-season, as my best friend had… hell, I didn’t even know what. Abandoned me? Cut me out? Confused the few smarts I had out of me with the last words we’d spoken to each other that weren’t about the game? “I can’t do this anymore. I think we just need some space.”And hadn’t that been a kick to the gut.
My best friend had gone and broken up with me.
Ever since I’d planted one on my friend before the beginning of last season, my friendship with Sutton had been screwed. Perhaps not immediately, but after a few weeks of things not being right, we’d finally reached the point of breakdown.
The surprise that I’d misread how he’d react had hit me hard. Without a doubt, I knew gut-deep that was the turning point. There I’d been, all up in his business, kissing him in public, camera flashes all around us, and so sure he’d go with it and laugh it off.
How wrong I’d been remained a struggle to get my head around. It shouldn’t have been a surprise, really. Sutton had spent years letting me get away with nonsense, putting up with his dumb-jock friend causing grief.
That kiss had been a step too far.
“You still good to go out tonight?” Ryan’s question pulled me away from my thoughts.
Immediately, I fixed an easy grin in place, so used to ensuring it looked natural. “Hell yes. A night out with my boys. Looking forward to it.”
Ryan peered over at me with a look of contemplation. Whatever he was thinking, I didn’t want to hear any of it. Both Ryan and Nate had attempted to dig for the past week of being here. Each time I’d changed the subject or blown off their concern with a joke. Not a chance I could talk about the muddle of thoughts and emotions that had bombarded me since last season.
I was saved from hearing any of it when our food arrived. Clapping and rubbing my hands together, I winked at the pretty server. “Thanks,” I said, laying on my American drawl and enjoying the blush tinting her cheeks.
When she left, Ryan snorted.
“What?” I cast him a quick look while piling on the ketchup.
“I swear, everywhere you go, you can’t help yourself and try to see how many women you can make blush.”
I picked up a fry and grinned. “I have a scorecard. It’s good to keep tabs and know that I’ve still got it.” He rolled his eyes at me and took a bite of his fish. I eyed it speculatively. “What was the name of that again?”
“Barramundi,” he answered after swallowing.
I wrinkled my nose, not a fan of fish at the best of times, and fish I’d never heard of would be a hard pass from me. “It stinks.”
“It’s fish. It’s meant to stink.”
My nose remained wrinkled, and I shook my head, “Well, shit stinks, and I don’t—”
“Mate, fuck off.”
I laughed and carried on eating my delicious-smelling burger. It didn’t take us long to polish off our food and head to Ryan’s pickup to go back to his and Nate’s place.
As we pulled out of the parking lot, I focused on the beach and the ocean. It would be nice to live close to a beach one day. In all honesty, maybe sooner rather than later.
At thirty-three, I was considered a dinosaur in the League and was kinda surprised Minnesota renewed my contract for another season. But maybe after this year, it would be time to stop.
Last year hadn’t been the best. While we’d had solid games, my heart hadn’t been in it. The joy of playing with my team had all but disappeared. That was partly because of Ryan’s transfer to Vegas, but more honestly, it was because of my and Sutton’s separation.
I sighed, leaning against the headrest.Separation. As much as people joked when comparing mine and Sutton’s relationship to that of a married couple, they hadn’t been that wrong. We’d done everything together, but last year it seriously felt like a marriage breakdown. The guy pretty much broke my heart with how he’d handled everything. I hadn’t known a friendship could have that effect on me. But fuck, it hurt.
“I’m just going to call Nate and let him know we’re on our way back,” Ryan said.
I bobbed my head, still not looking at him. A moment later, Nate’s voice came through the speakers. I tuned out the conversation, not wanting to hear their sweet talk.
As we went around one of the larger roundabouts, I gasped, eyes widening. “Fuck, Ryan, fuck.” I held on to the door, the other hand on my seat belt as the car reaching the roundabout entrance we were passing didn’t stop. I felt the hit. Felt my head smack against the window. And I sure as shit heard my yell as a second slam followed by an ear-splitting crunch surrounded me.
