“Jayden, shit, man. I owe you a drink, and you can make it the expensive one. For two seasons I’ve had my bet going, each year topping up, and fuck yeah, I won. Totally called that you and Sutton were an item. ’Bout fucking time you guys shouted it loud and proud. I’m happy for you, man. Like seriously.”Pearce cleared his throat, the sound of shuffling coming down the line. “So yeah… between you guys and Ryan…. Fuck, man, this is hard, but if you guys can do it, and playing on the same damn team…”
My eyes widened and my gaze connected with Jayden’s.
“Oh fuck,” he mouthed, and I couldn’t help but agree as a ball formed in the pit of my stomach.
“…so yeah, I’m gay.” Slightly unhinged laughter followed. “Holy shit, I said it. I’m gay, hell, that felt good to say. So, yeah, I wanna come out, but maybe when you guys come back to Minnesota, if that’s all right… I just, yeah, think I could do with the support. Uhm, so I’ll talk soon. Oh, and feel better, Jayden. I heard about the accident. Sucks, man. Make sure he’s making sure you don’t overdo it. Uhm… bye.”
The message cut off, and I was left shellshocked and feeling like a turd. I closed my eyes, guilt eating away at me, wondering what the hell I’d done, all because I was so needy and desperate to be near Jayden. “Fuck,” I gritted, opening my eyes.
Frowning, Jayden shook his head, his skin paler than usual, the same guilt reflecting in his eyes as I imagined he could see in mine. “We can’t take this back, not now,” he said. “Not after Pearce. Fuck, we can’t do that to him.”
Rubbing a hand over my face, I expelled a weary breath. “I know, you’re right. That there took so much fucking guts. Hell, the guy came out to us, thinking we were all brave and shit.” It wasn’t lost on me how much of a fucking coward I was. I felt an inch tall. Without a doubt, heart and soul-deep, I loved Jayden. Likelovedhimloved him. I’d loved him for years as my best friend, but my love now was all about hearts, rainbows, cocks, ass, and kisses.
Unable to come to terms with why him and why now, since my dick nor my emotions had ever stirred for another man before, I’d bailed. Epically so.
My heart pounded loudly in my ears. Was it time? Should I just tell him? Admit why I freaked? Admit that I loved him and wanted him to be mine? Admit that even before I realized the extent of my feelings, every time he’d hooked up, I’d been weirdly jealous, which I’d only recently understood the reason why?
“Gale, you look like you’re going to hurl.”
The sound of his voice had my attention snapping to his. Absolute trust shone back at me. I couldn’t lay my emotions on him. Not like this. Not now. It would be unfair and way too much considering everything else going on.
“I’m okay. Just thinking and feeling like a prize dick.”
He nodded. “So, what’s the plan? You’re the brains of this duo.”
I huffed out a humorless laugh, feeling anything but intelligent considering the current situation. I thought through the options, having heard what he’d said. “We’re engaged. We see this through. Just before media week, we… split”—those words hurt my heart far more than they should have done—“saying we’re still great friends, and move on.”
Remaining quiet, Jayden stared at me. When I finished speaking, he started nodding. “Okay, so we’re a couple. Both bi or gay, or any other number of terms I don’t fully understand yet?” He shrugged.
My gaze softened, knowing he would be researching up a storm all of those other terms and getting his head around them. “I’m comfortable with saying I’m bi.” My brain mocked me, calling absolute bullshit.Comfortable? Ha.
“Okay, me too.” He huffed out a breath, his shoulders visibly relaxing. “Apparently, it shouldn’t be a hard sell, considering the whole team was betting on us. Fuckers.” Oblivious to my forced smile, Jayden’s features smoothed out, appearing less rigid. “Right, we’ve got this.”
I nodded, despite the uncertainty itching at my skin. “We don’t tell anyone the truth.”
His wince was immediate. “I know you’re right, and I agree. You know both our parents are going to have something to say about everything, right?”
“I know it, and I feel shitty enough as it is, but we do this.”
“Definitely.” He quirked a brow at me. “So, do we kiss on it or what?”
I picked up a throw cushion and threw it at him, deliberately aiming for his chest rather than his head. I was a swell guy like that. “Keep your lips to yourself, wiseass.” I grinned, despite my heart flipping over. I could handle a flirty Jayden, since a “flirty” Jayden was how he’d always been. While now, each innuendo or look he cast my way ignited a needy reaction, it also helped to calm my nerves.
Jayden being himself wrecked me, but there wasn’t a single thing I wanted him to do differently.
CHAPTER7
JAYDEN
We’d already established havinga concussion sucked. There was a flip side to the headaches, flashes of nausea, and dizziness, though. One of the biggest being Sutton fielded the calls for the past three days.
Some he’d had no choice but to pull me into the conversation, where I grunted in understanding when told to do so by Sutton. But beyond those few times, I luxuriated in not dealing with disgruntled complaints about keeping our relationship a secret. Nor the whole planning sessions about the club’s PR handling our coming out—we still hadn’t agreed to anything concrete—in addition to HR needing additional paperwork signed since we were a couple working for the same company.
Being the patient genius he was, Sutton took it all in his stride. I was sure he got off on the level of paperwork we had to deal with. It was kinda sweet, really, weirdly so when Sutton actually got excited about pulling apart our contracts. When he got really into something that pushed him and made his brain work overtime, he got this extra sparkle in his eyes. He’d sit a little straighter, his eyes widening a little, and if he had a pen in hand, he’d gnaw it.
I liked those quieter times of him studying or explaining what something meant in complete layman’s terms. The man was the epitome of patience, and after the third time I’d slowly removed the pen from his mouth, just ’cause I could, he pinned me with his dark gaze rather than smacking me upside the head.
Another win for the concussed right there.
