“I don’t think three weeks of being a member carries much weight,” he deadpanned.
“Well, it happened.”
His mouth twisted, the cogs in his head turning from the look of things. Meanwhile, I filled the electric kettle and turned it on. By the time I returned to his side, I settled in for his questions.
“You know, I think it’s highly unusual for straight guys to allow other men to kiss them.”
“Just the one guy.” When his brows shot high, I smirked. “Okay, two,” I said, referring to the kiss we’d shared last year. And we’d definitely shared it. While there’d been a beat there of Sutton freezing when I’d planted my lips against his, I’d encouraged him to open and kiss me properly.
I’d been determined to do it right.
“You’re my friend, so does it really count?”
“Count as what?” he asked, his voice sounding a little edgier than earlier. This was the first time we’d revisited this conversation for months. At this point, I was just grateful we could talk this shit out once and for all and move past it.
“No idea, honestly.” I shrugged. “I just mean it was with you. We do everything together.” I refused to use the past tense, determined last season was a blip and one I’d sooner forget. “We shared a kiss. It was nice. Kinda hot.” My words were as nonchalant as they were true.
Sutton’s mouth dropped open, and his eyes bugged. “Hot?” His gravelly voice made me grin, him still being nonplussed by the whole thing apparent. At least this time he wasn’t grumbling at me and raising his voice.
“Well, you know. It wasn’t the worst kiss in the world.” Hearing the kettle click off, I grabbed a pan from the cupboard and put the noodles on to boil. I picked up another carrot slice and passed one over to Sutton. The guy was staring at me like I had two heads. I rolled my eyes at him, the movement hurting my brain a little.
“You had any meds since being awake?”
I swore he read me better than, well, anyone. There were times I was convinced he knew me better than I knew myself. “Not yet.”
“Go grab some, then sit down. I’ll finish up here.”
I hesitated, my gaze roaming his. “Okay, thanks, but we need to talk about our engagement, okay? We can’t ignore it.” Surprise lit up his features, and I snorted. “Yeah, yeah, Jayden Moore being all responsible and shit.”
His smile was small but good to see.
“You’re usually the first person to remind me and anyone that LGBTQ+ rights deserve respect and shouldn’t be used… nefariously.”
“Nefariously?” His lips twitched. “You going for a nineteen-point word, huh?”
I flipped him off as I left the kitchen, searching for my meds.
“They’re in the bathroom,” he called out, “and you’re right. The last thing I want to do is cause shit in the LGBTQ+ community.”
As I headed to grab my painkillers, I took a few deep breaths and allowed the relief of our exchange to settle over me. I talked a lot and joked around even more, but it had only been the past thirty-six hours or so that my usual BS didn’t feel forced.
That was the thing when you had a role to play while nursing a broken heart. No chance would I have let anyone see just how hurt I’d been the past few months. It meant I’d played the game and worn my smile like the armor it was. I’d lost my best friend once and refused to do so again.
We had to put the reports straight. I snorted at the word before sobering. A kiss had screwed us up last time, so what the hell would a fake relationship do?
Ice slithered through my veins. I wasn’t willing to find out. Not at the expense of my friendship.
CHAPTER6
SUTTON
After eating,we sat in the cozy sitting room, Jayden on the sofa and me in the armchair. This small house really was a nice place, completely unexpected, and I appreciated Nate organizing the refuge for us.
“So,” I started, “what do you think we should be?”
Jayden’s sleepy gaze was on me. Between a belly full of food and his painkillers kicking in, he looked close to passing out again. “Not willing to let anything come between us again.”
My pulse kicked up at the honesty of his words. It didn’t matter that his tone was groggy and that he was even more forthcoming when high on meds. He always, as inalways,gave me his truth. Sometimes he had a weird or backward way of expressing himself, but from day one, he rarely held anything back. I snorted internally. Well, beyond me not being his first kiss with a guy.
