Pausing my strokes, I turned to my side to face him. “You’re worth it, and you still have your sister to thank for reminding me I’m allowed to chase my happiness too.”
Ryan stroked my jaw, his expression lifting, contentment settling there. “You got the good stuff while I get my ass handed to me.” An honest-to-God pout formed on his mouth.
“At least it stopped you freaking out about how calm she was being when you first got back.”
A derisive snort left him. “Yeah, giving it to me both barrels, but four weeks delayed, kinda took me by surprise.” Amusement laced his words, and I chuckled, thinking about Amber. Admittedly, I’d also felt a little guilty discovering her softly, softly approach was a weird plan of hers to help convince Ryan to move back home for good. If not now, at least when he retired.
When she’d discovered that option had been on the table, which I’d sort of vetoed—we would wait to see how this year panned out—I’d expected her to come gunning for me.
Oh, how wrong I had been.
“Nineteen-year-olds are scary as fuck,” he grumbled.
Not sure I could make my voice solemn, as while he was right, it was still funny, I ended up nodding instead.
“I spoke to Micky after you abandoned me earlier,” he said, taking me by surprise. I’d managed just over an hour working out in the complex’s private gym before I’d worried I’d curl over. I’d waved Ryan off when he offered to come back to the condo with me, aware he usually spent three hours training a day. Me being here wasn’t going to change that. While he had time off before the season started, he needed to be in peak physical condition.
Keeping my voice light, I asked, “What did you talk about?”
“Asked that you were here safely and wanted to make sure you were settling in okay. Micky reminded me again to ask you to store his number in your phone, in case you needed to contact him.”
I smiled. “That was good of him.”
Ryan chuckled. “I think he’s super aware that I’m still undecided about next year. Can’t blame the guy for making an effort. If I retire, it’ll impact him as well, you know?” His smile was tender when he finished speaking.
“I know,” I said, “and no decisions yet, remember?” While Ryan retiring after this coming season remained on the table, we were absolutely keeping it on the down-low. I also felt a little guilty about Micky, especially as his agent’s reaction had blown my mind. His support had been instant. There’d been no harassment, no pressure, no grumbles of disappointment, simply legit acceptance. Honestly, from the way Ryan described it, he’d expected to hear that Ryan was quitting with no plans to return to America, contract be damned. That he wasn’t made him overjoyed, apparently.
“I’ll add his number. Not quite sure I can ever imagine a scenario of needing it.” The slight shift in Ryan’s expression caught my eye. “What are you thinking?” I asked.
“I know our plan is limiting risks of me being outed, but it could happen. And if it did, you’d need to contact him, especially if I’m not around. Micky would be the one to help you.”
My pulse picked up, thinking about the possibility of the fallout. I didn’t like the pressure Ryan put on himself one bit. I nodded. “I get it. But it’ll be fine. We’ll be careful and get through this year.”
If I said it often enough, just maybe I’d believe it. If Ryan decided to be a free agent and accept a new contract at the end of the season, it would be then that we’d be controlling the narrative.
CHAPTER22
RYAN
Sittingon the patio with the sun spilling down around us, the umbrellas offering us shade, I subtly pinched myself. Being out in public, even with the few cameras that had been directed our way, was all okay. I didn’t doubt that Sutton and Jayden being here took off the pressure.
I’d admitted to Nate that his real introduction to cameras, fans, and any paps would be easier if we weren’t alone. The hope was that while the gossip rags would get the scoop of me having a friend from Australia visiting, they’d be more focused on snapping images of me hanging out with my former teammates.
Drinking water like I’d just survived a hike in the Sahara—hell, it was hot—I laughed as Jayden told me about his zany aunt flirting with Sutton.
“He’s making it all up.” The eye roll from Sutton simply made us all laugh more.
I accepted my chicken salad from the waiter with thanks and sneaked a quick look at Nate’s plate to make sure they’d got his order right.
“You going to offer to cut his grilled chicken for him as well?”
I flipped Jayden off, ignoring my embarrassment that I wasn’t subtle. “Fuck off.”
Jayden reacted with a wide smile. “It’s all levels of adorable, you being attentive and shit.”
“What the hell!Adorable,” I scoffed.
“You know, that there screams years’ worth of indoctrinated toxic masculinity.” Sutton’s deadpan words dragged three pairs of eyes in his direction. “What?” he asked, picking up his fork.
