The guys were lapping it up, and so were a heap more people who were in the bar.
“You not joining them?”
A quick glance to my left, and I smiled at Sutton. “Nah. Ryan owes me this one. He’s paying up. I need to appreciate the moment.”
Sutton huffed out a snort and cradled his beer as he stood at my side, the two of us leaning against the waist-high wall splitting the main room from the small dance floor. “You know, we call this the Hucklebuck.”
I grinned over at him and laughed. “I did wonder why after just a few moves so many people were able to join in.” My gaze returned to Ryan, still on the dance floor and going for it, making all the moves hilarious. Even over the music, I could hear his loud laughter.
“So I hear you’re stealing him away from us.”
My brows dipped, and I glanced over to Sutton. I would love to steal Ryan away and keep him forever, but after today’s game, the thought of doing so made me uneasy. “What?” I asked, needing clarity as my thoughts were spiraling.
“For a few weeks this summer, right?”
“Oh, right, yeah, well, our winter. It’s been a long time since Ryan was home. His gran and sister have missed him like crazy.”
“And you?” His question startled me, made my breathing falter while my heart beat loudly in my ears. When I didn’t answer and looked at him, my brows low, he clarified, “You grew up together, right? Ryan’s your best friend?”
I nodded and exhaled deeply. “We did. He was.”
“Was?”
I shrugged and returned my focus to Ryan, my smile reforming quickly. “A lot has happened in the past eight or so years, but we’re reconnecting.” It would have been easy to gush and overshare, and I thanked Christ I hadn’t drunk so much that I’d gotten loose lips, which was what had happened with Tallis a while back.
Sutton grinned, and I noticed that smile turned a little into a lazy smirk. “I think as far as Ryan is concerned, that BFF status is still intact.”
“BFF?” I quirked a brow at him. “Really?”
He snorted out a laugh and gave a half-arsed shrug. “Yup, BFF status. It’s totally a thing. Jayden insists on it.”
The few of Ryan’s friends on the team I’d met and hung out a little with yesterday, I liked. When they’d told a few tales about Ryan, there’d been a mixture of envy that I’d missed out on so much combined with relief that he seemed to have genuine people here who cared about him.
While Ryan and I still had plenty to talk about, he’d apologized for flaking on our friendship, and his family to some extent. I knew there was more to the story. My anger had long since passed. Maybe a bit of frustration at missing out on so much bubbled under the surface, but it was more than that. My heart ached for the man and how much he’d missed out on.
He’d left us all, everyone who loved and cared about him.
I hoped soon I’d understand the reasons why better, but knowing he’d been without his family and me for eight years ached.
“I think it will do him good, going home,” Sutton said.
I remained tight-lipped, wondering if he was going to continue. His focus moved to the dance floor, and he grinned. I followed his line of sight, my heart kicking up a notch when my gaze connected with Ryan’s. He shot me a wink before laughing at something one of his basketball buddies said to him.
“He seems happier since you guys got back in touch.”
I cast a quick glance at Sutton, whose attention remained on his dancing colleagues.
“But I don’t know… there’s something else too.” With his words, he angled to look at me.
Discomfort battled it out with my curiosity. It didn’t feel quite right talking about Ryan like this. Not that Sutton was saying anything bad, but it just felt odd. But my curiosity was absolutely piqued. Missing out on eight years left a lot of gaping holes in knowledge. “What do you mean?” My question escaped, despite the fizzle of guilt in prying for information.
Sutton’s gaze searched mine, making me still at the intensity I saw in its depths. I had no idea what he was looking for or seeing, but I was sure he saw too much of… everything.
“It’s true that he seems happier. He’s been laughing more and, I don’t know… I hear about people ‘lighting up’ or some shit. I don’t even know what that really means, but he definitely does that when he’s texting or talking to you.”
Lighting up?I willed my eyes not to close with thoughts of the possibility, willed my expression to remain neutral.
“But he also seems, I don’t know… lost, empty.” He shrugged, pulling his gaze from me and taking a swig of his beer. When he snorted a laugh, I frowned. “But what the fuck do I know? Fuck, I’m drunk, and I need a piss. You good here?”
