Ross
The mid-afternoon sunbeat down on us, unrelenting and right on temperature for this time of year. Alan was helping me muck out the goat stall, preparing it for Bessie, who was unusually quiet. Benji, meanwhile, kept his distance, nudging against Valkyrie and annoying her rather than us, which was something.
“Does she look to be straining to you?” Alan leaned against his fork, eyeing Bessie. I followed his line of sight, focussing on her stomach.
A thrill of anticipation buzzed in my chest. “I think you’re right.”
While we’d been clearing up, she’d remained quiet, content to let us clean up around her. I’d hoped it meant she was close, getting ready to give birth. Finally it looked like the wait was over.
The sound of a car engine dragged our attention out of the goat stall. It was George. This morning, he’d stopped by briefly to say he couldn’t look at Alan’s car till this afternoon instead. Talk about timing.
“I’ll go see to George, and I’ll let Hazel know about the goat.” He left with a wave while I focussed on gathering the towels and nose sucker.
Not knowing how many kids she’d be having may mean Bessie would need a helping hand, so I was prepared as I could be. After watching a couple of videos, I already felt reassured that if I had to assist, it’d be a lot easier than the time I had to help Valkyrie, whose calf had got wedged.
Gravel crunching under feet headed my way, and I looked up, startling a little when I saw Nick. This time it didn’t take long for me to dislodge the air clamped in my throat at seeing him. Partly because my attention dropped on to his young son, who did a small hop and skip as he held his dad’s hand; the other reason was that yesterday’s impromptu meeting had settled some of the unease in my gut.
Plus, there was no abrupt laughter, so I called it progress.
Knowing there wasn’t going to be any vileness sent my way for being gay had soothed any lingering doubts I’d had. But also, he’d stepped up by helping Alan and Hazel, and more than that, he’d trusted me with his son.
Last night before heading to sleep, I’d spared barely more than a thought on the man and his family, examined my reaction. In many ways, I didn’t bother psychoanalysing myself or my response since seeing Nick again or since discovering he was married to a man.
There was no point in as much as I didn’t need my thoughts swirling in my mind, tugging at any lingering insecurities I may have had.
Life was too bloody short for that.
Instead, I considered what, if anything, I was going to do next. The jury was still out, because I didn’t know if I wanted to drag up the past with him.
I certainly didn’t want to hash anything out. I’d be full of shit, though, if I didn’t admit that an acknowledgement that how he’d treated me had been all kinds of fucked up wouldn’t go amiss. Potentially it’d be cathartic, even.
But for now, with the man and his boy heading my way, I could be myself. I could smile at his cute kid, and I could return friendly conversation.
“Hey, Ross.”
“G’day, Nick. Murphy.” I encouraged them to enter the stall and get out of the fierce rays.
“Alan said you might be having a new goat.”
“I think so. There’s been a couple of contractions I noticed while getting some things ready, so hopefully she’s ready to push soon.”
“She have babies out her bum?” Wide-eyed, Murphy stared at Bessie, fascination evident in every angle on his young face.
I pressed my lips together and looked up at Nick. A wide grin was directed my way, drawing a chuckle from me.
“Not quite,” he said. “Just a little lower than her bum, I think.”
Murphy nodded and angled his head, scrunching his nose as if to get a good look.
“I don’t know how long it’ll take, but you guys can stay and watch, maybe help out.” The offer came with surprising ease.
Nick’s brows all but met his hairline at my offer. “Oh wow, yeah.” He cleared his throat and peered down at his son. “How about it, Murphy? You want to stay and watch baby goats being born?”
“Yes!” He jumped up and down.
“Hush.” Nick knelt beside him. “We can only stay if you’re not shouting and jumping around, okay? I think…” His gaze lifted to mine. “What’s her name?”
“Bessie.”
