“Not good enough,” Rusty seethed.
Gem threw up several hands. “Well, I don’t know what else I can swear on, if mylifeisn’t serious enough for you.”
Rusty wracked his brain for a moment, before he leaned in, using Gem’s raised knee to steady his balance. “You don’t breathe a word of this to anyone—”
“Even Toni?” Gem asked.
“Especially Toni!” Rusty hissed, and Gem flinched. “Not a word to anybody or else I’ll ensure you never have sex again.”
Bone-deep horror twisted Gem’s features, and he gasped dramatically. “But I love sex!”
“I know,” Rusty said smugly.
“That’s cruel and unusual punishment.”
“And yet, it won’t be punishment enough if you squeal.”
A haughty smirk curled the edges of Gem’s mouth. “And how, pray tell, do you expect to enforce this? You gonna follow me around and bat away all the dicks flying at my ass?”
That was a mental image Rusty could have lived his entire life without seeing, but he shook it off. “If I have to. I’ll be this dimension’s biggest, most dedicated cockblock.”
“You’re highly underestimating my ability to pull dick,” Gem sniffed.
“Ha, I don’t need to compete with you for the dick. I just have to be there.” Rusty placed his second hand on Gem’s other knee and leaned in farther. “You’re on the dance floor, living your best techno life, and some hot Incubus comes to dance up on you. But he can’t, because I’m in the way.”
Gem’s jaw dropped with a comical gasp, but Rusty wasn’t done. “Some cute Rhopa approaches you at the bodega to ask for your number. Oh wait, I already gave it to them, except—plot twist—it’s one number off!” Gem’s leg fur vibrated in an annoyed hum as Rusty went in for the kill. “You’re at the bar, and a thicc Bovyn tries to buy you a drink. But guess what? I’m already there, telling him about the summer you had frosted tips.”
“You absolute whore!” Gem wailed. “Frosted tips were in that year.”
Rusty shook his head, slow and somber. “Frosted tips areneverin.”
Gem scowled. “You’re evil!”
A sharp grin cut across Rusty’s face. “You bet your ginormous ass I am.”
“Don’t you dare bring my ass into this! You’re already threatening her enough.”
That brought Rusty up short. “Your ass is a she?”
“You’re godsdamned right it is, and she’s a hungry bitch. Get in her way, and my bussy will eat you alive,” Gem said, flashing fang.
Rusty shuddered in revulsion. “I hate everything that just came out of your mouth.”
“Well, I can’t help it. Mama’s gotta eat!”
“Stop talking about your ass like it’s sentient,” Rusty yelled.
“Given her size and personality, she might as well be,” Gem shouted back.
Nearly nose-to-nose now, both their chests heaving, they glared at each other, and Rusty couldn’t decide whether he wanted to wring Gem’s neck or… Well, he wasn’t exactly sure what the other urge was, to be honest. His blood roared in his ears, and for some inexplicable reason, he felt hot all over. His insides squirmed, and his mouth was suddenly desert dry.
At some point, Gem’s hand had fisted in Rusty’s chest fur, and his fingers flexed, his many eyes roaming over Rusty’s face. Something charged in the space between them, and Rusty’s gaze dropped, unbidden, to Gem’s mouth.
Objectively, it was a nice mouth. Not that Rusty spent much time considering the niceness of mouths, but he figured that Gem’s was nicer than most. Modest top lip with a nearly perfect cupid’s bow. Full bottom lip that had once been graced with a dainty silver ring. Gem had taken the piercing out a year or two prior, but Rusty could still see the scarred divot left behind.
Even so, Gem’s mouth was still… nice. Generally speaking, of course.
“Rus?” Gem whispered, and the weight of two more hands coming to rest on Rusty’s waist brought with them the reminder that Rusty was still very naked, and he and Gem were so very close to each other.
