“That’s cool.” My voice was strained, hollow even. The mention of his name sent a flood of emotions through me. “Um…is he coming tonight?”
Carmen shook her head with disapproval. “He’s grounded,” she explained as the music faded out. “Something about a broken gnome and having a boy over after curfew.”
“Mmm.” Heat flamed up my neck while the lights dimmed. I’d inadvertently gotten him grounded, and now he wasn’t here. I wouldn’t see him in a costume or dance with him or kiss him tonight. And I hadn’t realized how much I wanted to until now.
MaybeI should message him back,I thought, watching the stage curtains open.At least apologize for leaving him to deal with the mess I made.
A spotlight landed on Sawyer. She bypassed the mic stand and made her way to the middle, her tap shoes click-clacking. Then she stopped and turned her back to the auditorium. As though someone flipped a switch, the drag king persona appeared.
Captain Jaymes Catz stood straighter and adjusted the uniform. The speakers flared to life with the intro to “As It Was” by Harry Styles, and Catz waited for his cue. He did a little jig that emphasized his shoes as the beat dropped.
“Yes, king!” I yelled, rushing closer to the stage.
He was moving with precision, lips perfectly syncing with the song. All I could think about was how nothing was the same as it had been before now. I wasn’t the same person I had been the morning of Pride Day. Wasn’t the same me who’d stashed secrets in that shoebox. And I didn’t want to be.
Nothing—and no one—was holding me back anymore.
As the song came to an end, Catz clicked his shoes together and tapped toward the front of the stage. He grabbed the microphone from the stand, sinking into the splits. “Good evening to the guys, gals, and nonbinary pals,” he welcomed as applause erupted. “Thanks for coming out for our second Pride celebration!”
Sawyer had been so secretive about her drag king persona, but she was up onstage with the biggest smile now. She’d just shared part of herself without shame or judgement. The way she stood up—full of pride—made me feel like there really was a place for me, for us, here in Beggs.
“Before we begin the rest of the drag show, I want to turn it over to the library,” Catz continued while motioning toward stage left. “We couldn’t have done it without them.”
Bronwen stepped into the spotlight, her Elizabeth Bennet dress billowing as she crossed to Sawyer. They hugged, and Sawyer passed off the microphone. “Give Captain Jaymes Catz one more round,” Bronwen said, clapping her hands. Sawyer took a final bow before retreating backstage. “I know we’re here for fun, but I wanted to take a moment to make a few announcements. Firstly, please know the public library has been and will forever be a safe space as long as I’m the librarian.” She paused as more applause sounded. “Secondly, it goeswithout saying that we’re all in agreement over Mayor Buchanan’s asinine ordinance. If you’d like to join the effort to oust him from office, you can volunteer with Carmen Bedolla’s mayoral campaign at the sign-up table in the back.”
I turned, following her line of sight to Estrella Books. Carmen waved at the crowd and held up a clipboard. As much as I wanted to believe the mayor could be stopped, I didn’t think it was possible. Not with supporters like my father. I’d been watching the news and knew it would only end in—
“Zeke Chapman.”
The sound of my name cut off my thoughts, and I spun back around. The beaded fringe of my dress clattered as I looked up at Bronwen.Huh?
“I want to thank him for coming up with this genius idea for Pride Month,” she explained while I felt the pinpricks of stares. “Not only has he gone above and beyond for his high school’s QSA, he has also stepped up as a volunteer. The rec center is under threat of defunding because of their LGBTQIA-plus program, and Zeke has volunteered to help them continue it despite the mayor’s threats.”
How does she know that?
I felt self-conscious as more people looked my way. No one else knew I’d done that, not even Sawyer. Because if they knew—now that they knew—they would only tell me that I was a disaster who had no right mentoring anyone.
“Thank you, Zeke,” she said over the heartbeats thundering in my ears. “You’re making Beggs a better place, and that’s why we’re naming you our honorary King of Pride.”
I cringed at the title, bracing myself for the punch line. Except nobody laughed. Nobody yelled that I was a fuck-up orthat I didn’t deserve to be proud. Instead, there was more applause. These strangers knew my name, knew I had started these speakeasies. And they didn’t doubt me.
All I could think about was the pride flag I’d once hidden in that shoebox, the old newspaper clipping about the Pride protest. How I’d never felt like I could be me. Ever since I came out to my father, I’d been told there wasn’t a place for me in this town. That I would only ever be a target.
For the longest time, I believed him.
Then I joined the QSA for the first ever Pride celebration in town. Mayor Buchanan had told us no one wanted it, that our community wouldn’t support it. But people had shown up. They’d signed Sawyer’s petition and set up tents and flown rainbow flags. It only proved just how wrong the mayor was. How wrong my father was.
There was a place for me here, and I finally felt like I belonged.
Chapter 13
zekechapman
hiii
I reread my sent message through sleep-bleary eyes. It was time-stamped at 2:03 a.m. Mason was all I could think about while we’d cleaned the library. I rode around town after Sawyer dropped me off, deciding whether to DM him back. Finally, after thirty minutes typing and retyping my reply, I finally hit send and went to bed. He still hadn’t read it yet, but it was only eight in the morning.
It’s way too early,I told myself as my mom’s footsteps echoed down the hallway.Take several seats and calm the fuck down.
