"When did you know you were ready to let yourself love Herrick?" Bryn asked, her hazel eyes focusing on Maude with an intensity that surprised her.
The question forced Maude to still. Before she could turn away or try to escape from the question, Bryn reached out with her silver tattooed hand and grasped Maude's hand. As soon as the tattoos met, their previously permanent lines began to dance and twist like plumes of smoke, just like when the tattoos and blood oath had been made.
The sudden flashing drew the sister's attention down to the mirrored ink laid on them by the blood oath they had sworn. In all the chaos of their return to Nida and her father's dinner, Maude had forgotten to ask about the blood oath she had accidentally sworn with Bryn. If Aeric had noticed the ink, he had not mentioned anything to her. Perhaps Hilgafell would provide the answer she sought.
When Maude met her sister's eyes again, they were bright and feverish.
"I don't know if I have yet," Maude finally said, her voice coming out as a whisper. "Herrick has a way of pushing me until I break. I didn't think I loved him for a long time, and when I knew, I never said the words, but I allowed my walls to fall just a little bit to let him in."
She gripped her sister's hand and looked down, noticing that Bryn's knuckles were stark white against the rest of her skin in anticipation of Maude's answer, whether it would provide relief or sorrow. So, she chose to be honest with her sister.
"With Herrick and I, there were no long suffered loves that held our hearts. We were free to fall into each other without the guilt of choosing to leave someone else in the past," she said quietly as she looked over at their cabin.
Liv had already disappeared inside the small structure, but Maude's meaning was not lost on Bryn. Her sister's cheeks flared a dark pink, the freckles on the bridge of her nose darkening as her eyes widened slightly.
"Just because your blood heats for another does not mean the love you had for Revna was false," Maude said as she grasped her sister's other hand. "You do not insult her by finding solace in the arms of another. In fact, if Hakon wasn't such a stubborn ass, I'm sure he would have understood by now that Eydis just wantedhim to be happy. However, it's not my place to knock some sense into the Heir of Rivers; Herrick can deal with that."
Bryn chuckled as her eyes filled with the tears she knew her sister would refuse to shed, so Maude continued her speech, "I'm not saying that you should forget about Revna. In fact, if you told this other person about her, I'm sure they would enjoy hearing about the woman you held so close to your heart. So be brave, Brynna."
Maude released her sister's hand to cradle the side of her face as she finished speaking, running her thumb over her cheek to catch the rogue tear that slipped free. Bryn closed her eyes and leaned into the touch, her chest rising in a deep breath as she found her calm. Maude watched her sister accepting her guidance, her words that she knew were true.
"Thank you," Bryn said as she opened her eyes and stepped back, a soft smile teasing the corners of her lips.
She looked like she wanted to say more, but Maude watched as Bryn bit her tongue and began walking toward the cabin. Rooted to where she stood, she watched her sister duck into the cabin and leave her alone in the busy forest that seemed to be alive with merriment even as ice sunk into her muscles.
Allowing herself to think about the secret she still housed beneath her clothing, Maude quickly ducked behind a fallen tree. She had managed to sneak in a weapon under everyone's noses, including the Grand Soothsayer.
Sitting on the ground, she withdrew the dagger. The red strip of silk was still tied around the handle, the dull grey blade that sucked the light in rather than reflect it, its runes unreadable to her. Removing the bag from her shoulder, Maude wrapped the dagger her mother had given her in an extra pair of leggings she had packed before stowing it again.
She slouched against the moss-covered log, her shoulders feeling weighed down by the secret she carried while in this sacred space. With the amount of drink and powdered mushrooms that Maude had detected as they passed through the camps, trouble was around the corner for them, and she refused to be unarmed and vulnerable. The talk she'd had with Bryn left her feeling exhausted, especially afterthe day they'd had hiking through the mountains and then having to withstand a ritual to enter Hilgafell.
With one hand, Maude reached up and ran her fingers over her face. The dry splatters of blood were still caked on her skin, the edges softening in her sweat and running down in faint streaks that only served to remind her of what was asked of her when she entered Hilgafell.
And do you accept Hela herself into your blood and soul, Daughter of Shadows?
I read your fate, Daughter of Shadows.
Maude needed to speak with the Soothsayer. Alone. Tomorrow, when their entire day was filled with no responsibilities, Maude would speak with the older woman and get some answers of her own.
29
As soon as the sun had set on that first day in Hilgafell, Bryn watched as, one by one, the members of their group split off into the shared sleeping space behind the thick tapestry at the back of the cabin they would be staying in.
First, Aeric and Dahlia offered to section out the back room into the four individual spaces before the Shadow King said goodnight. He lingered as he brushed some of Maude's hair out of her face as she focused a little too hard on scrubbing the dried goat blood from her skin. The way her sister tensed before relaxing into the sign of affection made Bryn's chest tighten.
Then Dahlia and Gunnar split off so the Elven healer could redress his wound and keep a close eye on it overnight. Hakon remained outside the cabin, seated on a large cushion against the wall with an almost empty bottle of Elven wine in hand.
As Bryn continued to stare into the fire that crackled in the hearth— looking for what, she wasn't really sure— Maude finally got up and disappeared behind the tapestry without a word. She watched as Herrick followed her only a moment after the tapestry swung shut. From the other side of the room, Liv snorted.
"They better throw up an air shield to mute the noises coming from their corner of the room, or I am dousing them with ice water," Liv said as she leaned against the wall opposite Bryn.
She chuckled before the silence descended between them again, less comfortable this time. Her mind drifted to that quiet moment in the hall she had shared with the Elven, how close they had come to colliding as their clear attraction to each other overwhelmed them. Bryn's skin heated as she remembered Liv's touch on her neckand her ribs, how the her skin felt soft and welcoming under her lips as she dragged them over cascading dark flesh that seemed to fizz like citrus on her tongue as Bryn breathed her in.
But then Revna had clawed her way to the front of her mind, the grief that seemed to hang around her closer than the air in her lungs.
Maude had told her earlier that she should be brave. At first, it seemed so simple to her. Now, the task seemed impossible.
Shaking her head, Bryn settled deeper into the pile of cushions that surrounded the hearth. Just when she thought she might have found enough courage to speak to Liv and tell her what she was feeling, the female stood and hurried to the corner of the cabin where a small, makeshift kitchenette held a store of food and drink. The rustling of cabinets being opened and closed, along with the suction releasing from the icebox that stored colder items for consumption, were the only other sounds in the cabin for a few minutes.
