“It’s the hormones,” I blurted out. I didn’t even know what was true anymore. Lying all night was starting to get to me. Jack was starting to get to me—and not in the way I wanted. But I had already done enough pretending for the night. I wanted something real.
“What’s the hormones?” he asked patiently.
“What’s making me want you so badly,” I admitted under my breath.
Jack inhaled sharply as his fingers dragged down my arm to my waist.
What was one more night?
One more opportunity for you to feel more things than you should.
“Maggie…” Jack started with a warning tone. “Are you sure you want this?”
“No.” I honestly had no idea what I wanted. I told Jack I wanted to know his feelings, but I was scared that would lead to things I wasn’t ready to confront yet. A level of care that might wreck my heart. I told myself I wanted to get closer to him, but I knew I wouldn’t be able to stop if I got too close. Nothing was constant. Nothing stayed the same. I needed something that held still and wouldn’t shift throughout this pregnancy, this relationship, this lifetime. This eternal attraction toward Jack felt like the only thing that hadn’t changed since I found out I was pregnant.
But the consequences of acting on that attraction?
Those were precarious.
“Then, no.” The firm answer came from behind me as Jack grasped my chin to face him. His blonde waves flopped over his forehead. His brown eyes creased in frustration. He looked so good. So worried.
“No?”
“We can figure out what’s going on with us, or we can leave it in the open. But until both of us are sure of what we want, nothing can happen.”
“Agreed.” I swallowed. It felt like we’d had this talk ten times before and always came to the same conclusion. Except one of us always caved and came back to the other.
Not this time, I told myself.
“No more of this.” I turned to face him, focusing my eyes on the wall that was his bare chest. “We’re done with it until we can define what we are. For real.”
The words that left my mouth were true…except the idea of Jack taking my lips with as much passion as he admired them heated my core. Tempted me to push his buttons and find out whether or not he would fall victim to our sexual attraction.
“Deal.” His voice faded into a whisper as his fingers traced the contour of my face, and his stare became intense again. My teeth sawed my bottom lip. I ignored the tingling throughout my body and clenched my thighs at the sight of the gorgeous man in front of me. His lips parted, his scent taking over my body, his hair ruffled. The amount of willpower I displayed by not wrapping my arms around his neck and pressing my body against him shouldn’t have been possible with how perfect he looked.
But whatever discipline I prided myself on having, Jack didn’t care. He pulled me against his body, anyway. Let his thickening cock nestle between us like it didn’t matter we shouldn’t do this. His hands traced the curves of my body like he was memorizing them. He was branding me, burning me. Lust burned below my hips. Heat spread between my legs. Red flushed through my cheeks. All I could hear was Jack’s heavy breathing, and I wished it was because he was burying himself inside of me.
His gaze caught mine again, and I barely registered his words. “Starting after this.”
Jack’s lips crashed onto mine without hesitation, pulling me flush against him and forcing my mouth open. My gasp of surprise allowed him to tangle his tongue with mine, exploring every part of my mouth like it was the first time he was kissing me. Just like he always did. Except it wasn’t the first time. Every time he kissed me, surprise took over before the familiarity ofhimset in.
Starting after this.
I couldn’t get enough.
I may as well have taken advantage. Jack gripped my ass with both hands. I wrapped my legs around him and licked into his mouth. My hands tangled into his blonde locks, guiding him exactly where I wanted. He moved along my jawline and down my neck in short, heavy breaths. His lips seared my skin, branding me with his tongue. Everywhere he touched turned tofire. A low groan escaped his mouth as he moved back to my lips. I grasped his roots harder and melted into our kiss. Jack felt like everything I was missing. The one person I could rely on enough without feeling codependent. He made me feel caught up enough in my feelings that I forgot—just for a second—how easily he could leave me in the dust. How easily we could turn into the aftershock of my parents’ disaster.
I should have known it was ending from the intensity lessening each time his lips took mine. Deep, intimate kisses turned into light pecks Jack placed on my lips, needing to end it but not ready to let go. My hands fought my resistance to keep him close as he pulled away and met my eyes. Mine held uncertainty and fear. His might have held the most desperation I had ever seen. His voice was a low, hoarse whisper. “Starting now.”
My mind was so glazed over from the kiss that I could barely comprehend the words coming from his mouth. I too focused on the way his lips moved, the swelling apparent from my teeth in the midst of our kiss. “What?”
“I hope you enjoyed that, sweetheart, ‘cause it’s the last time it’s going to happen. At least, for now.” His accent bled through clear as day, not an ounce of regret on his face.
I cleared my throat and held out my hand to shake his. “Friends. Deal?”
He took it, and I didn’t miss the way his thumb caressed the top of it. “Friends who are having a baby together. Deal.”
Chapter fifteen
