She paused before responding. “You sound so much calmer. No panic attacks on the flight or afterwards?”
“Not one.” The panic attacks, which were a wave of impending doom that knocked me to my knees, had begun long before Freddy’s full frontal moment at the party. My doctor thought they were a combination of work and personal stress, and he prescribed anxiety medication as a cure. They didn’t happen as often now, but one occasionally hit, and I had to breathe and visualize my way through them.
“Thank God. I’ve been really worried about you, honey.”
“I know.” Her sisterly concern put a lump in my throat. “I’m sorry for making you worry. I should never have kept the marriage charade going for so long.”
“Don’t you dare apologize to me. You did nothing wrong, and we all know that. Freddy is the only villain in this story, and karma will get him, eventually. I hesitate to tell you this, but Joyce called me this morning. Do you want to hear what she said?”
Our agent, Joyce Cohen, negotiated all our deals pertaining to the show, and Tori was probably about to tell me that my marital drama had shot our chances at selling the rights toMs. Matchto a streaming service. This nightmare would never end.
“Hit me with it. I’m lying down right now so this is a good time in case I faint.”
“Stop catastrophizing. This is good news. Direct Play isn’t the only company vying for the syndication rights for our show. Two other streaming services have come forward with offers, and there’s a freaking bidding war going on!”
My heart rate sped up. “Are you kidding me?”
“Nope. It’s happening.” She bubbled over with excitement. “This whole Freddy situation has been horrible for you personally, but it’s also bringing new viewers toMs. Match, and our value has skyrocketed. Sorry, I don’t mean to sound so happy about profiting from your heartache.”
“Hell, something good should come out of it. I just can’t believe it.” Although I shouldn’t have been surprised. Drama sold.
“I know,” she said. “Thank goodness I pushed for executive producer credits for both of us, or we would have gotten hosed in all of this. The numbers they’re talking, Lolo…it’s a lot.” She told me the amount, and my jaw dropped.
She continued talking as my brain tried to catch up with what she was telling me. We were already living a lifestyle I never even dreamed of as a kid, but this kind of money was way beyond that. This was serious syndication money.
“If you’re cool with it,” she said, “Joyce will negotiate the best deal she can get us and then, once we approve it, she’ll send the contracts over to our lawyers. It’s going to move quickly.”
“Of course, go for it.” I looked around my little cabin, wondering whatMs. Matchviewers would think of me now, huddled under a Pendleton blanket and thumbing through a magazine calledFly Fishermanwhile eating airport snacks. Not exactly the glamorous life one would expect of someone about to earn millions on a syndication deal. “Thank you for taking care of all this. I feel guilty that I’m here when this deal is going down in New York.”
“Stop. I don’t mind at all. There’s a couple more important things to think about before we sign onto this though. If you do the deal before you finalize your divorce, this becomes a marital asset. You’d have to split it with Freddy.”
“Oh, hell no!” This man had taken enough from me already. He wasn’t getting my syndication money too. “That’s not happening.”
“Exactly. Which is why you need to get your divorce papers moving and get Freddy to sign them ASAP. I told Joyce that the deal needs to be kept completely quiet in the press because we can’t have Freddy finding out about it and using it as leverage in the divorce.”
“Damn it.” The thought of giving him one more dime made me sick to my stomach. “I’ll talk to my lawyer again and see where we’re at with the settlement.”
“Good. Put it on the fast track. Here’s the other thing that worries me. As much as we’d both profit from this deal, you know what it means if people watch all the old episodes.”
Of course I did. “It’s going to turn into a game ofWhere’s Waldowith everyone looking for Freddy.”
Tori was the star of the show, but viewers liked seeing me, her twin sister, interacting with her. Freddy only appeared in a handful of episodes across five seasons, always because I’d paid him to film with us, but those few appearances would now be gold. Who knew what viewers would extrapolate from seeing Freddy and me on screen together? Streaming our show in its entirety would certainly keep my personal drama alive in the press and on social media.
“Just remember,” Tori said, “this kind of money would make it easier to keep your private life private from now on. That kind of insulation from the world doesn’t come cheap.”
“Plus, I have to pay for this divorce.” Bitterness crept into my tone. “He’s going to get half of what we have, and I’ll probably have to pay him alimony, too. We’re going to ask him to take a lump sum instead. I really want to walk away from this marriage and never have to deal with Freddy again. Ever.”
“I don’t know how realistic that is,” she said gently. “Graduations, weddings, grandkids—Serge and Julien will keep you and Freddy in each other’s lives.”
“Ihatethat, but you’re right.” We’d worked so hard to make sure our marital issues didn’t affect the children, and it was hard to admit that my maneuvering resulted in more pain and embarrassment than if I’d divorced Freddy years ago.
“Julien called me today,” she said, “and from the way he was talking, he wants nothing to do with Freddy ever again. He said you told him to forgive his dad for hooking up with a bartender at a public event, which means you’re a better woman than I am.”
Serge and Julien both knew Freddy and I had privately separated, and Serge seemed to believe that Freddy’s “mistake” at Jentori was an embarrassing error in judgment but not a betrayal of me. Julien, my fiercely loyal rule follower, saw it differently.
“My higher self prevailed,” I said with a sigh. “I don’t want him to hate his dad for my sake.”
“You’re a seriously good human. I’ll hate Freddy forever, though, and you’ll never convince me otherwise. If I could have him permanently exiled from the United States, I would. Hell, if I could make him disappear completely, that would even be better, but I can’t go to jail, Lolo. I need my gel nails and weekly blowouts.”
