Rowan crosses his arms and spreads his feet like he is physically bracing himself for whatever Jay has to say, and Jay has seen too much of the defensive posture to last a lifetime. It’s argumentative and unnecessarily belligerent. Worse is that it’s not Rowan’s usual state of being.
“Rowan,” Jay sighs.
“Not challenging you. I just wanna be in there, not out here. You know?”
“I know. Do you know why?”
Rowan pulls at his hair, his shoulders sagging. “Fuck. I can’t talk about this right now. My wolf is going crazy.”
Raising an eyebrow, Jay crosses his arms. “Like before?”
Rowan laughs wryly. “I wish. That was at least predictable. Fuck, Nix is all I can think about. I can’t even let him out of my sight for a single second to fucking blink. I don’tmeanto, but my wolf can smell that he’s…”
Rowan seems to fold in on himself even further, pressing his eyes with the heels of his palms. Only to open them with tears in them. “I can’t even take care of myself most days. What kind of dad am I going to be?”
That might be the most straightforward question Jay’s been asked all fucking day.
“You’re going to be a great one.” Jay grips Rowan’s shoulder, voice steady. “You are the best of men. Try not to worry so much. This is a pack-baby. It’s not like when you were growing up with just your mom. She helped you be great, too, but you’re not alone like she was.”
It’s not lip service—Jay truly believes Rowan will be an amazing parent. All his mates will. Together, they’ll make sure this child is loved above all else.
“You think so? I mean, you would know.” Rowan steps in, pressing his forehead to Jay’s shoulder.
“What? Me? No. My dad was shit—isshit. My mom, too, for that matter.”
“No, not your dad.You.”
Rowan kisses his cheek and turns toward the house, leaving Jay standing in the driveway, heart racing, love and gratitude thick in his chest, burning at the corners of his eyes.
“Even if your dick is smaller!” Rowan shouts over his shoulder, cackling.
Jay barely registers the words before instinct takes over. “Oh, you little—” He bolts after him, reaching the door just as Rowan tries to slam it shut.
Rowan shrieks, diving for cover behind Leo, who’s attempting to put something on the TV. “Save me! Dad’s mad.”
Leo doesn’t even look up, just sighs when Rowan slides his freezing hands under his shirt, up over his abs, and cups his pecs. “Damn it, Rowan.”
Jay shakes his head and heads toward the kitchen—where Gideon has Luca on the counter, tongue down his soulmate’s throat, one hand gripping his dick. He is not—as he promised—finishing dinner.
The pasta water is boiling on the stove, but there’s nothing in the pot. His stomach growls in protest at the delay and Jay debates whether to risk adding the pasta and pissing off the chef or just going hungry and checking on the others.
Yeah, no point dying over spaghetti.
He backs out of the room and finds Grayson and Nix curled up on the couch under a blanket, Tsuki sprawled out in front of the crackling wood fire. They’re deep in a whispered conversation, eyes locked on each other.
They wouldn’t turn him away, but something about the moment feels private—so he detours down the hallway where he finds Finn holed up in the borrowed office, typing furiously on his laptop.
“Hey. No internet, yeah?” Jay leans against the doorway, admiring how his mate’s blue-black hair shines in the glow of the desk lamp, the light glinting off his glasses.
“Gideon disconnected the router and confiscated our phones. He said he’ll check them later, make sure they’re clean.”
“Good. We’re heading out to see the site tomorrow. Erin meeting us there?” Just saying it makes Jay’s chest feel tight.
Finn nods and finally closes the lid. “Yeah. Just her. The courts haveclosed the arena to non-essential viewers. That means us, Hayes’s people, our attorneys, and all three judges. Plus guards.”
Guards. So, no one can panic and leave the field.
It hits him then. This is really happening.
