Shock more than pain had him letting go of me, and I brought both my hands together, swinging them over my shoulder and then brought them both down on his back, right where his kidneys were.
I knew I couldn’t win this fight, but it was enough to have him releasing me entirely. I stumbled back, glaring at him.
“Your stupid loyalty to this club is going to cost you everything, Dante. You’re going to be left with nothing, cursed to live your life a pathetic, lonely old man, with no one left to care for you except some elderly fucking brothers who are just as fit for the scrap heap as you will be. This,” I said, gesturing around us. “Is already crumbling before your very eyes, and you’re blind to it. Your daughter is injured, your clubhouse is burnt to the ground, your dad’s best friend has just been murdered… and that’s only the fucking beginning, and we both know it! If you can’t see how damaging that is, then you’re a fucking fool and you deserve to lose all of this.” I spat at his feet, adding yet more bodily fluids to his boots, and then stormed down the garden path, ripping the gate open.
“Oh,” I said over my shoulder. “You know what you said about two negatives making a positive? You know what else makes a fucking positive? Two people who didn’t think about the fucking consequences. But only one of us will be around to deal withthatparticular disaster. The other one doesn’t deserve it.”
I raked my eyes up and down him with a sneer and then slammed the gate. I had no idea where I was going. All I knew was that it was far away from wherever he was.
I found myself back at the clubhouse.
The builders had been by whilst I was at the hospital this morning, and had begun delivering the materials needed for the rebuild.
I entered the building, memories assaulting me as I ran my finger along the soot covering all the furniture.
I could see Dante dragging me through the bar on my first evening here. I could see myself arguing with him in the booth at the back as I told him all about Alex and what he had done to me. I could see Mama ringing the bell, telling everyone it was last orders. I could even see Macbeth, skulking in the corners, always watching, always plotting. It was clear as day in hindsight, but at the time, he was just Macbeth. The heir who became the spare.
“Penny for them?” I spun around at the sound, my hand coming up to my chest to steady my heart. I saw Vienna, bending low to enter through the fallen door frame, his face just as weary and drawn as Dante’s had been.
“The last man who said that to me ended up kidnapping Dante and setting this entire shit storm in motion. Forgive me for not wanting to play a second time. You can keep your penny.”
He gave me a tight smile. “I saw what happened.”
I nodded, not surprised. “Of course you did. You’re always one step behind him, aren’t you?”
“I should hope not. It would make sex a bit awkward, don’t you think?”
I laughed, though I didn’t really feel like it.
“Do you want to talk about it?” He said, all trace of humour gone. He just looked… sad. The entire grounds had a deflated air about it.
“Not really.” I said, sitting on one of the barstools, the cushion was burnt, making the material dig into the back of my thighs.
Vienna sighed heavily, but pulled up another stool and sat next to me.
“Can I ask you a question, Rachel?”
“Sure,” I mumbled, pulling at a loose thread on my sleeve.
“What is it you want?”
My head snapped up with shock. “From what?”
“From everything. From this place, from Dante… What is it you want?”
“I…” It was my turn to sigh. “I don’t know.”
“Let me rephrase. Do you want Dante?”
“It’s not as simple as that.”
“From where I’m sitting, it's exactly that simple. If two people love each other, then it’s a very easy yes or no.”
“I do want Dante. Love? I’m not sure. But I know that I want to be with him.”
“So, what is the issue?” He asked softly. There was no judgement in his voice, no anger. He was just willing to talk to me, to listen to me.
“I don’t want all of this.”
