Page 58 of Finding Yesterday
“I miss you, Mama. I like to imagine what it would be like if you were alive. I like to think we’d own a restaurant together, cooking like we never really got to do.” I fold my arms, bitter that we didn’t get to have more times like that day we baked cookies after school. I blow out a long whoosh of air. “I know for a fact that we have the same taste in recipes. Anyway, I came here because I found the recipe card for your vegetarian shepherd’s pie, and I bet it’s to die for. I’m so happy.” I purse my lips. “But I did want to ask. Is it okay if I swap out half of your butter for Greek yogurt and a dollop of applesauce? I don’t like using that much butter, and it’s not good for Daddy’s cholesterol.” I clear my throat. “It’s gotten worse since you’ve passed, and of course, he’s older. We have to watch those kinds of things now.”
I look around, making sure that Winston and I are the only ones here. It’s faint, but I swear I hear the ruffling of leaves in the distance. A light breeze has kicked in, and I stay quiet for another minute, waiting to hear it again. Maybe it’s telling me something?
“I wish you were around so I didn’t feel like such an outsider.” I twist my lips. “I’m just different from Nate and Emma, and I always have been. You know that. They’re still off in their own little musical world, and Daddy gets sucked into it as well. He means well, and he’s good to me, but he just doesn’tgetme like you did.”
There’s another long pause of silence, and nothing comes to me, not that I really expected it to. But one can always hope.
Then I notice Winston is shivering, so I say, “Well, we better get going before we freeze to death.” I pack up everything before fishing my keys out of my pocket. “I just wish I could ever get a clue why you went down there that day.”
It’s bad enough that I lost my mother at seven years old. But to never get answers as to why she was taken from me so suddenly and tragically is a blistering wound that never heals.
I could go in the mine again, not that it ever provided answers before. But I should try again. Not now at night, but at some point, I will.
My mind turns to Jack and Pops. Do they come here to remember Hannah? Or do they avoid it because it’s too painful? I want so much to understand Jack’s pain, but it seems he barely understands it himself.
A breeze ruffles the trees again, and the sound calms me.
That’s all, but it’s enough.
CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO
THE CHEFS HAVEstarted serving my black bean burger, and the online reviews so far have been fantastic! Even better,The Grapevine, the town’s free paper, put out a story about The Fine Bone’s new dishes, titling the piece, “Big City Urban Flavors, The Buzz of Our Small Town.”
So now, I’ve spent the last few evenings working on changes and additions to the other side dish recipes, and I love the basics of each. They’re so well-thought-out with that Southern feel, something I’m sure Jack doesn’t offer at his San Francisco restaurant. The grits cake with roasted red pepper sauce is so delicious, and I don’t even like grits. But it makes me wish I’d known Hannah because we would’ve definitely agreed about what makes for a great dish.
I’m returning things to the back pantry when I hear a squeak. Looking down, I see a flash of gray skitter across the floor, a tail in its wake.
Oh, no.
A mouse. And as much as I love animals, the health department will shut Jack down so fast his steaks would still be sizzling. I need to run out and buy a catch and release cage. I know everyone else will just do the traps that kill the mice, and I can’t have that.
I rush out of the pantry, hoping to keep this little secret until I can deal with it properly.
“Hey, Poppins.”
I jump, spinning around. “Hi, Pops!” I cringe, waiting to be told I have to go preset all the tables.
“It’s time to learn the books,” he barks.
“What?” My brain can’t catch up.
“The books. You need to understand every detail of them if you’re gonna run a place.” He waves me on. “Let’s go.”
Before I know it, Pops and I are in the office, and he is flooding me with information. How to do the scheduling, manage the inventory, check all of the outgoing payments for bills, and what information to prepare for the accountant.
It’s all a bit of a blur, but I do my best to concentrate. It helps when Pops has me take a practice stab at each, making sure I’ve gone through every process. My brain hurts but I commit to doing this with him as many times as it takes until I’ve got it all down pat.
When I’ve done more than I thought possible, Pops sighs. “All right, let’s call it a day with this crap.”
“Sounds good to me.” I blink to try and clear my head.
“And if you screw any of this up, you’ll wish you hadn’t.” He stands.
“Roger that, no screw-ups.” I give him a salute before standing to leave the office.
“Hey, Poppins, can I have one of your cakes?” He points a thumb over his shoulder to the kitchen. “To test them, of course.”
My heart skips a beat. “I’d love that.” I rush back out to the kitchen, Pops following my lead. Then I fix him a plate and hand it to him. “Here you go.”
