Page 92 of Feathers of Ash and Hope
“Oh, that doesn’t sound good.” I bite my lip. I’ll have to be careful, then. He scoffs.
“No, nothing good ever came of it.” Tanner shakes his head. “Not a place where anyone in uniform ever wants to show his face.”
“What are you talking about?” Miller inquires, but Tanner waves him off. “Nothing good. Didn’t you go home last weekend to help your brother prepare for the next assessment? How did that work out?” he asks instead, and I happily let them move on to a different topic. I won’t get more information out of Tanner without raising suspicion, anyway.
I will need to change before I can head to the Dark Horse. But with the information that it’s close to the port, I should be able to find it. I’m buzzing with nervous energy at the thought of finally finding answers.
I look up and catch Tate watching me. Guilt tries to overpower my anger at him and my excitement over this chance. I stomp it out like the last embers of a fire.
I will not feel guilty about doing everything to survive and save my family.
His gaze is probing, like he wants to figure out my thoughts. It’s too much. I jump up and hurry off to the restrooms.
My thoughts jump around, trying to find the best way to meet the dragon. If I manage to slip away from the group before we get back, I would avoid having to sneak out later. Unfortunately, I think Tate will have everyone look for me once he sees I’m missing.
Why does he have to be so annoyingly observant?
I splash water on my face and take a few deep breaths to calm down. When I look in the mirror, my cheeks are flushed and my eyes are determined.
I will not blow this chance.
I step into the hallway and slam to a stop when I seehimwaiting for me. My feelings flash like the spokes on a fast-moving carriage, turning and turning until they are one big blur of chaos. Why do I always feel too much when he’s around? I avert my gaze and try to slip past him, but he moves fast. Before I can blink, I find myself between him and the wall, his body blocking out everything else. My mind goes blank. The chaos inside me screeches to a halt. Tate leans in the tiniest bit, and for a second, I think he’s going to kiss me. My heart picks up speed while I try my best to appear unfazed.
He shakes his head like he knows exactly what I’m thinking. Bastard.
“This would get you into trouble,” he says, his voice rough. As if I would care about that right now.
“I can’t let you—” He starts, and that pulls me back into reality. Oh no, he didn’t. Not him, too.
Anger explodes in my chest, leaving it hollow.
“Oh, this is rich,” I nearly spit the words. “I’ve had it with everyone telling me what I can or can’t do.” I get into his face. “Let me tell you something, Kyronos. If I decide to sleep with you or any other rider, it’s my decision and my risk, not yours, so you can’t let me… anything.”
“You’re not sleeping with anyone else,” he growls, and indignation and triumph war inside me. How dare he tell me what to do, but … is he jealous?
My common sense wins out. For all I know, he cozied up to another girl last night, and now he wants to tell me I can’t do the same if I feel like it?
Fuck him.
“I’m free to do what I want, just like you.” I bare my teeth at him. “And thanks for informing me that you told Jared about me,” I add, escaping from the delicious cage of his arms and body to hurry back to our table.
The nerve of this man.
I slam my fist on the table while I slump back down in my seat, making all the drinks jump. All eyes land on me.
“A mosquito,” I say dryly.
“A mosquito?” Jared raises his eyebrows. “In winter?”
I shrug. “I hate those buggers, drawing blood when they have no business even being there.” I earn a few quizzical looks before everyone gets back to their conversations.
Jared looks unconvinced, but I don’t care. I think I earned some major points since I neither slapped nor jumped my centurion. I’m not sure which urge would have won out if I had stayed.
Jared leans over the table like he wants to say something but is interrupted when the reason for my mood drops back into his seat. I turn away from them and give Boko my full attention.
I meet Tate’s eyes more than once when I look up, but he doesn’t try to talk to me again, and when he heads off on his own after we leave the Golden Boar, I ignore the twist in my gut and decide I’m glad the fates are making it so easy for me. It gets even easier to slip away when the group breaks up even more. No one pays me any attention when I fall back and then slip into a narrow side street.
I hold my breath for the first few steps, expecting someone to call my name, but no one does.
