Page 87 of Feathers of Ash and Hope
“I already helped Summer stretch out a little,” Zaza comments. “He didn’t complain once today, but it won’t be pleasant tomorrow. As stubborn and proud as the rest of us.” She grins up at me. “He fits right in.”
“You are getting along well,” I say, hoping for some information since they talked every time I looked in their direction, but Zaza only nods.
“You should have paired her with me,” Jared whispers, passing me, clearly amused by my frustration. “I would have all the information for you by now,” he says with a wink before he seizes the last free seat next to Ara. I glare, but that only makes his grin widen.
Ara is quiet during dinner, despite Jared’s attempts to draw her into a conversation. She sends me a look I can’t decipher before she rises and excuses herself for the night.
Jared gives me a questioning look, but I shrug. I have no idea what that was about and have no intention of telling him about my encounter with Ara last night.
The next two days are pretty much the same. Ara persistently declines my offers to heal her, and while she’s back to her friendly and exuberant self with everyone else, she’s bitingly polite to me, and it chafes.I don’t even have the excuse to help her find her way since all outposts have the same build.
I’m sitting on the fortification wall, my legs dangling over the edge, while the rest of the flight sits in the common room. I heard her peals of laughter the minute I came close and changed direction.
It’s dark, the light spilling out the windows behind me the only light source next to the stars. We are far from any other settlement, and nothing but wilderness surrounds us. It can get cold up here in the mountains, and I’m glad we have the outposts with their warm fires waiting for us each evening instead of spending the night in a tent, like on some of the other routes.
The rooms are not luxurious, but they do have a proper bed, a warm common room to hang out, and people to cook and maintain the base. No skyriders and only a handful of regular warriors are stationed here, but since many routes pass it, riders are nearly always around.
I take in the quiet around me, but my mind is still on Ara. Now that I spend so much time around her, I realize she isn’t as open as she seems. She evades or deflects questions about herself with a laugh or a joke, and no one seems to notice. I wonder if she keeps Cassius and Ilario at arm’s length, too.
“She is protecting them in case she goes down,”Daeva remarks.
I go over her actions and realize she could be right. Images of Ara throwing herself in front of me and her shifting in front of her cousin in the bar pop up. She even jumped off a Strix tosave someone from her flight. And like Daeva says, keeping her ruse to herself can be seen as her protecting her friends from the consequences, too.
Great, now I feel like an even bigger asshole for implying she only cared about herself.
“Awareness is the first step in betterment,” Daeva consoles me. Sometimes she sounds like one of those sayings you would frame.
“I heard that,”Daeva retorts, and I chuckle.
“I’ve been an ass again, haven’t I?”I ask her.
“Don’t worry, everyone who knows you is used to it.”
“Thanks,”I reply dryly, which makes her caw, laughing at me.
“A copper for your thoughts.” Jen hops onto the wall and sits down next to me. She’s two years older and with the third squadron of the southern division, tail flight. Our flights cross paths today since they head back to Telos while we go the other way. We get along well enough even though I wouldn’t call us friends.
“Not much on my mind. Sorry to disappoint you,” I answer.
She scoffs. “I don’t believe you, but if you don’t want to share, that’s fine with me.” She nudges my shoulder. “Since we’re on the topic of sharing. The nights up here are awfully cold. I would be up to sharing a bed if you want to.” She smiles at me.
Maybe I should take what she’s offering. Perhaps it would help to get Ara out of my head.
She trails a finger down my arm, scooting closer. But there is no heat, no tingle of anticipation, and the thought of taking her back to my room settles unpleasantly heavy in my gut. All I can think about is long blond hair and blue-green eyes.
I am surely and truly obsessed with that woman.
I shake my head at Jen. “Sorry, I have to decline.”
She pouts. “I’m sorry, too.” She gets to her feet, then smirks. “Guess that answers my question about what is on your mind, though, or should I rather ask who?” She looks at me expectantly.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” I lie.
“Sure you don’t.” She snorts. “You just declined all this.” She makes a sweeping motion down her body. “For brooding alone out here in the cold.” She shakes her head, her short dark hair flying with the movement. “If there isn’t some girl involved, I will let Axar choose my dinner.” Axar is her bird, and he loves his food bloody and still twitching.
She suddenly laughs, then shudders. “He is eager to educate my taste. I better not be wrong, Kyronos, or you will hold my hair while I throw up afterward.”
I shake my head at her. Maybe I should nudge her in Jared’s direction. I’m sure they would get along splendidly, and I know he just ended things with Nadja.
