He watched her face fall. She looked as vulnerable as a little girl who’s had her ice cream cone swiped. Silently, she turned on her heel and left the house.
“Cat.” Jared stopped her with a hand on her arm. “What’s wrong?”
“Nothing.” She parted her lips in a smile that didn’t quite reach her stormy eyes. “You have a beautiful house. I’m sure you’ll be very happy here.”
“No, I won’t.” Jared relented and cupped her chin, forcing her to meet his gaze. “Not unless you’re here with me.”
“What do you mean?” she asked.
“I mean that I’ve been trying to give you time to be on your own, but the truth is I miss you. I want to spend my life with you,” he said.
“Oh, Jared, I...I can’t.”
She burst into tears, and Jared cursed himself for pushing the issue and making her cry. Pulling her into his arms, he rested his chin in her springy hair and hushed her with soft words and hands that swept up and down her spine.
He felt his throat tighten and he swallowed, sucking in a gulp of air. It was now or never. He had to tell her. His gut clenched, and he closed his eyes, battling the nerves that threatened to swamp him. He could do it. For her, he could take the biggest risk of his life.
“Cat, I love you,” he whispered. She stiffened in his arms, and he knew she’d heard him.
“Don’t!” Cat said, pushing out of his arms and turning away from him. “I can’t do this. I need to be on my own. Damn it! I’ve waited too long to find my independence. I won’t give it up. Not even for you.”
“Cat.” Jared was in front of her in one stride. His hands cupped her face, and he forced her eyes to meet his. “I don’t want you to give up your independence for me. I want the pigheaded pain in the butt that fights me over where the windows in the kitchen should be or what kind of music she wants on the radio. I want the woman who is brave enough to travel across the country by herself, but is kind enough to take along someone who she thinks is stranded. Don’t you see you’re different with me?”
With a shaky hand, Cat caressed his cheek. Oh, how she loved this man. But she couldn’t let him deceive himself. She knew herself too well. She’d do what she always did with the people she cared about. She’d let him become her whole world. She’d lose herself in him, until he became so bored he’d look somewhere else for amusement. She couldn’t handle that. With anyone but Jared, she’d survive, but to have that happen to them, it would destroy her.
“Jared, I can’t. I just can’t.” Her voice broke and her tears flowed freely over both of them.
Her tears soaked his shirt, and Jared knew she wouldn’t change her mind. Belatedly, he realized the irony of having the woman who opened his world be the same one to slam the door in his face.
He had tried to give her time to be independent. Although, he supposed a few days wasn’t a lot of time. But he loved Cat. He loved her unreservedly and without fear. For as long as he could remember, he’d been terrified of loving anyone too much for fear that they’d be taken away from him like his mother. But his love for Cat was so strong, it wouldn’t succumb to the fear.
He knew he was being selfish, but hell, when a guy finally finds his soul mate, he doesn’t want to wait to start a life together, he wants to start that life right now. But Cat wasn’t ready. Maybe she never would be. What was to become of them?
10
Cat perused the produceaisle of the grocery store with an eye for something exotic. Cantaloupe, kiwi, rutabaga, it all seemed pretty bland. Then her gaze locked with a mocking blue one, and her heart skidded to a stop. But the gaze wasn’t topped off by a head of bright blond hair; instead a black mane surrounded the face that grinned back at her.
