I blink. What a little shit. I know I should be upset that she was with another guy but honestly…it doesn’t hurt like it’s supposed to. "I gotta hand it to you. I never knew." Then I pause, frown. "Wait—what about Thanksgiving? She told me she was with a friend."
"We made turkey and watched ‘New Girl’in our pajamas." He grins.
Okay, that’s… kind of cute. And honestly? I’m impressed. Maybe I underestimated him.
I lean in, curiosity piqued. "Do you guys... you know..."
Nathaniel bites his lip and looks down at the table.
"That's none of your business," he mutters.
"HA!" I laugh, slapping the table. "Igotyou. She totally friendzoned you."
"Listen, it’s not like we’ve never…you know what, I’m not talking about this with you—"
"Hey, no judgment. I get it. Sarah has some particular tastes in bed. If you're not super open, it can be… a lot."
Nathaniel’s eyes narrow. "What do you mean by that? You know what? No. I’m not encouraging you."
I laugh into my espresso. He folds his arms, scowling, but I can see his knee bouncing under the table. He’s flustered, thinking over if he wants to know more or not. It’s adorable.
Then— "Okay, wait." He leans in, voice low. "What do you mean, particular tastes?"
I study his face. How much info is too much info? I don’t want to scare the guy.
"If you and Sarah werereallyintimate, you’d know." I search his expression. Nothing. "You guys really didn’t do it much, huh?"
Red creeps up his neck. I shift in my seat, suddenly hyperaware of the pressure building in my jeans. The blush on his face, his nervous energy, the way he’s looking at me allcurious and waiting—it's doing things to me I wasn’t prepared for. It sent me straight back to the confusing feelings I’d buried in high school…the ones I’d convinced myself were all in my head.
"We… only a few times in college. Not often." He sips his juice. I track the movement of his throat as he swallows. Bite the inside of my cheek.
"So let me get this straight—you’ve only slept with her a handful of times overfour years, and now you’ve flown across the world to declare your love?"
He rolls his eyes but nods.
"Have you been with anyone else in all that time?"
His mouth opens. Then closes.
Damn.
"Holyfuck!" I exclaim, leaning back. People glance over. Nathaniel ducks, hissing,
"Can younot?"
"Nathaniel, how—why—have you cut yourself off from life like this?" I push my sunglasses to the top of my head, dragging my hair back. I catch him watching the movement, eyes lingering.
I think he’s a fan of my hair. I’m not sure why but I feel like I should note that.
"I don’t know. I just... really like her."
"Nathaniel—"
"Stop calling me that—"
"—have you everwantedto be with someone else? Another woman? Anyone?"
"No—" His answer is immediate. Too fast. "I mean… I haven’t thought about it. I’ve always had Sarah. She’s enough."
