Heart pounding, I push open the screen door and step back out onto the porch, breathing in the crisp, damp air.
Maybe this isn’t as over as I thought it was.
Chapter Five
Kelsi
I lay back on the bed and stare up at the popcorn ceiling as my best friend Abby gives me a solid lecturing. I haven’t always appreciated this no nonsense part of her personality, but there are times when I need a good verbal spanking, and this is one of them.
“What do you want, Kelsi? If you like this guy, pursue it. If you don’t, go back to L.A. Maybe move your mom out there so you don’t have to go back to Rugged Mountain all the time. Though,” her voice rises, “you would be missing out on my arrival.”
“What?”
“I just rented a cabin out near Miner’s Pond. It’s a little place, but I read this article online that says if you want to meet the man of your dreams, you have to start living the life that a guy you’d want would be living, and I want a big, rugged mountain man. So… to the mountains I go.”
I smile wide and sit up from the bed. “You’re not kidding.”
“No, why would I be kidding? I’m thirty-five years old. I have to start making something happen or I’m gonna end up alone.”
“But you don’t know anyone up here.”
“I’ll know you…if you stay.And my brother’s best friend, Hank, is moving into town with some MC group that he’s a part of. They’re called the Chaos Brothers. Have you heard of them?”
“No. I’m not into that scene, but… is this the same brother’s best friend you have a thing for?”
“Shut up!” She laughs under her breath. “I don’t have a thing for him.”
“Right, so you’re moving to the same town because you… hate him?”
“No, he told me he was moving, and it made me realize how I needed a change of my own. Plus, I already know Rugged Mountain from visiting you so much. It makes sense. I’ve seen the men up there. They’re big, rugged, inked up, and they all seem super protective. I don’t know why every single woman in the world isn’t living up there.”
“Okay, okay… I agree with you on that part, but I’m also remembering a few months ago when you told me about the dream you had about Hank.” I bite back a grin. “I seem to remember a big dick slapping you in the face.”
She laughs hard and clears her throat. “And you’re so different? You dream about Brooksevery night. You used to tell me you craved the way he touched you.Craved…like you’re a vampire thirsting for his life force. And now he’s sitting on your porch, desperate to take care of you, and you’re on the phone with me? Come on! Get in there and suck his blood! Drain him of all of his fluids.”
Okay, now I’m giggling. “I’d like to drain him, alright, but I think what I craved was familiarity. Besides, we haven’t stopped arguing since I got here, and my life is in California now. I’m hanging out with celebrities, going to fancy parties, and living my best life. Brooks would never like that kind of lifestyle.”
Abby drags in a deep breath as though she doesn’t believe me. “I’ve known you forever and a day. I don’t thinkyoulike that lifestyle. Sure, you’re having fun, but it’ll get old.”
“I’ve been there five years, and it’s not old yet,” I lie, my stomach churning as my mind frantically tries to radically accept the life I’ve built in California. I’m supposed to love it there. I’m living my dreams. I’m writing full time, and I’m at parties with gold plated shrimp.I eat actual gold.
So many people would kill to be me, but the truth is, I’m not happy. I haven’t been happy since I left Brooks.
“Whatever you say,” Abby groans under her breath as though she’s annoyed. This is the bonus of having a friend forever, and also the downfall. She knows me well enough that she doesn’t feel the need to sugarcoat the truth anymore, and I could use some powdery reassurance right now. A vote for the life I’ve built away from this mountain, instead of the glaringly obvious truth that I should come back and fall in love with the man I’ve been trying to avoid. “You know I love you. I’ve loved you since we were kids and our mothers insisted we become besties.”
Our moms were friends in high school out in Texas. My parents moved here after they met and had me, but we visited with Abby’s family a few times a year down in Texas and vice versa. There was something so exotic about having a friend outside the range that bonded us together. She went to a different school, spoke with a weird accent, and had a ranch where she rode horses. That was wild to me, and I’m pretty sure the mountains always seemed wild to her.
“Go out there and talk to him. I just checked your weather. It’s pouring rain, Kelsi. You owe it to yourself, and don’t fight this time. Just have a real conversation.”
I know she’s right, but I’m not sure how to make the transition between the bed and the porch. So instead of overthinking it anymore, I let her go and let my legs take over.
I stand from the bed and peek out the bedroom window to see Brooks rocking on the front porch with a beer in his hand. I wonder if he still keeps the cooler in the back of his truck like he used to. He’d stock it with drinks and snacks so we’d never be without. Something tells me he’s still doing that.
I miss the little things so much.
“Okay,” I sigh. “I’ll talk to him.”
“Good! Remember, don’t be mean. You’re there to suck him dry.”
