Page 20 of Going Down Smooth: Part One
Lox carries a large pot to the table, appearing all kinds of domesticated. His grey sweatpants and white t-shirt accentuates his goods and I find myself tracking every twitch of his muscles as he makes his way towards me. “You need to eat, Mouse. Stop looking at me like that. I am not on the menu. At least, not yet.” He winks and sits a pot of macaroni and cheese in front of me.
Check, please. Who needs to eat?I squeal in delight, clapping my hands excitedly, bouncing up and down on Trey’s lap, making him stifle what sounds like a moan and grunt having a fight.
“Mac and cheese,” I say with a wide smile. Yep, I am giving zero fucks about my obsession with pasta and cheese. It is my all-time favorite dish, and the fact they remembered and made it for me warms my heart, chasing away the rest of the darkness that had held on to the edges of my subconscious.
“Like any of us would forget your borderline, almost in need of a therapy session, worthy love for macaroni and cheese,” Knight finally chimes in with a shrug, snapping out of his broody mood and joining us at the table. Nate and Lox finish placing food in front of me and I waste no time filling my plate. Six days without real sustenance makes a girl ravenous.
We all eat in companionable silence as I take my fill of cheesy macaroni goodness, baked chicken, salad, with fresh baked bread rolls. Apparently, I slept through breakfast and lunch so I devour two plates until I can barely breathe. Trey refused to let me sit in another seat, opting to steal bites of my food, making me growl in protest.
“You are perfectly capable of making your own plate, Trey Stevens.” I playfully swat his hand away but I can’t eat another bite anyway.
“You need to learn to share, Mercy,” Trey says with a pout, leaning around me with his lip poked out as he tries to pinch more food makes me laugh. From the corner of my eye, I watch Knight fold his arms across his broad chest, rolling his eyes. Ugh, grumpy grump.
“You need to put me down and get your own food,” I counter as I push my plate away.
“I can’t help myself, I need to hold you,” he leans down to whisper. His breath brushes against the shell of my ear as he purrs, making me shiver. I squirm in his lap, noting the hard length sitting snug between my ass cheeks. I gasp softly.
Lox quirks his brow up enquiringly then smiles slowly. “My Little Mouse isn’t thinking of her food any longer. Are you, Mouse? Tell me, can you feel Trey’s cock? Is it nestled between those pretty ass cheeks of yours?” I feel my face flush, my body immediately reacts to the deep timbre of his voice. My panties instantly soak with slick, my scent sweet and heavy in the air. Lox and Trey both groan, and from the look on their faces, I’m about to become their dinner.
“Fuck,” Nate mumbles under his breath, shifting in his seat. “Merce, your scent is sinful.” It’s official, I am so screwed. Literally.
Knight clears his throat again, bringing my fantasies of them laying me on the table and eating me out to a screeching halt. He eyes Trey, Nate, and Lox, then the mood in the room shifts.
“Mercy, we need to talk. Before we go any further there is something I need to tell you.” Knight steeples his fingers together, resting his elbow on the table, his food untouched, lips set in a firm line.
“OK.” I set my fork down, swallowing hard, hoping that whatever he has to say doesn’t stop the joy I feel in this moment. But you know what they say about good things. . .
“It’s about your dad.” He sighs. “Six months ago, he told me he was dying of incurable cancer.” Knight’s face drops and so does my heart. He had a heart attack, surely my parents would have told me this. Was I that far removed? Why would they keep vital information from me?Because you ran. . .
“I—I thought—"
“Before you say anything, there’s more,” he cuts me off.
I nod for him to continue. My shoulders slump forward, the emotional high I was riding turns to a pile of ash at my feet.
TWELVE
KNIGHT
Idrum my fingers on the dining table, the thump-thump-thump sound grounding me as I relay Benjamin’s plan for Mercy. I only told my brothers the bones of it the day of the funeral, so for the most part they were hearing it right along with her for the first time. I watch guilt, anger, frustration, and regret play out on her face as I tell her every detail. Benjamin’s cancer, the doctor’s demands for him to rest and how he refused, determined to continue to grow the business for Mercy.
Benjamin didn’t want Christopher to sell the company because his fellow packmate had become overzealous in his religious teaching when it came to our society’s hierarchy. Openly speaking out in his church about the seclusion of Omegas and how we need to regain control before the old ways are lost forever. Whatever that means. I guarantee he didn’t treat Seneca Smooth with anything other than respect, so why the contradiction? No, Christopher is seeking power and prestige. If he ever got his hands on Smooth Bourbon, well, he would be one mega church away from cult status in my opinion. I am almost certain Mercy’s father felt the same way. His words come to me, summoned from the very depths of my mind. . .
“Smooth Bourbon is an equal opportunity employer, Knight. I don’t discriminate here, I protect all designations regardless of their Alpha, Beta, and Omega status. The world is changing, and Christopher and so many like him want us to remain in the dark ages. Edward and I believe in a future where our daughters are free to make their own choices. I failed Mercy because I should have never demanded she mated with your pack. You were all inseparable, it was already going to happen. Yes, it was a shock when she finally presented, but I should have let it all play out naturally. I should have supported her. My stubborn daughter ran from me, and I will never get that time back. Seneca still holds Mercy’s loss over all of our heads. But I will right my wrongs. Whether Mercy ever forgives me or not. At least I can do this for her.”
I sigh as I repeat her father’s words. I can feel my packs simmering anger as I rub at my chest, my own emotions making themselves known as acid reflux, like a burn is singeing the back of my throat. I’ve never kept anything from them and its pained me for months to keep this from them. They have every right to be pissed at me. I am only the head Alpha because they chose me; we are all equally matched and they trusted me to lead our pack. But I made a promise to keep this between Mercy’s father and me until he could tell her himself.
“He wanted to tell you this himself. He thought he had time, Mercy. Your father had been given a prognosis of a year and his death came much sooner than expected. It seems that the heart attack was an accumulation of the stress and strain he was under, I think. Honestly, I don’t know for sure.” I shrug, clasping my hands together, keeping my eyes on her and then turning them on my brothers. “I am the only one of us who knew. I kept this from the rest of the pack, per your father’s wishes. I’m sorry you had to find this out the way you did. But it seems he made provisions with his lawyers in case he didn’t get to you in time. This was not a ploy to control you. Your father, despite what happened when you presented as an Omega, always had your best interests at heart.”
I scrub my hands down my face, settling back into my seat, feeling the weight of the burden I’ve had to carry for six months lift from my shoulders. Now, they all know. Now, the ball is officially in Mercy’s court. I would give anything to know what’s going on in her mind right now. I don’t want to push her, so I opt to let the silence between us remain.
I am not normally an anxious man. I thrive on control and structure to get me through every day. I leave the spontaneity to Lox, and the emotional openness to Nate and Trey.
I know I’m a therapist’s wet dream, all kinds of stilted because of the loss of my parents and having to grow up sooner than I should have. Yeah, knowing is half the battle, right? I took the responsibility on my shoulders to shield Nate. One of us deserved to remain a kid for as long as they could. I don’t regret it. My life has little room for how I feel and why I’m feeling it.
Which is why I’m annoyed at myself for fidgeting under Mercy’s scrutiny. She watches me, brown eyes searching. Does she not believe me? I hope I haven’t lost her trust but all we have are the lost years between us. She doesn’t know the adult versions of the men she claimed to love all those years ago.Let her see me. Mercy could always disarm me in a way no one else could. She sees straight through my bullshit. So, I sit here and wait. We all remain quiet as she processes everything I’ve divulged. I expect her ire, I expect her to tell us all to go fuck ourselves and storm out of the room and get out of her life. She promised she wouldn’t leave, but after my truth bomb, she has a right to renege on her promise. Her father had the best intentions but maybe—
“This is all my fault,” Mercy whispers in what sounds like defeat as she eases out of Trey’s lap. I can tell he doesn’t want to let her go but this moment seems too crucial to try to comfort her. She needs space to work this through on her own.